Saturday run March 15, 2008: 8.33 miles of urban funness.
Attendees: (In no particular order of running ability) Kim, Jill,
Kris, Jeff and Cory.
First off I must comment, how can a run not be good when it starts
with the following conversation:
"Did you wipe?" (only a teacher would ask this question)
"Yes I wiped. I wiped and I wiggled"
"Did you forget your sports bra?" (again a teacher question)
"No. I got two on"
And then off they go, down the road,over the bridge thru the ghetto,
side by side (for those of you who are not familar this is is in the
same writing style as the book "The Poky Litte Puppy" which is my all
time favorite children's book)
Kris said to Jeff and Kim, as she plodded beside them, her foot hurt
and she would be taking it easy....then Jeff and Kim did not hear from
her again till 3.22 mile where she was waiting at the corner for
everyone to meet up. Don't know what kinda of Coffee Kris is drinking
before the runs but please please please get some to Kim asap. The
improvement she has made is baffling..I am almost sure it is that
coffee that TUM brought back from his trip.
Discovered that we have a dog named "Dave" in this town. Who names a
dog "Dave"?
If you pray hard enough. Your prayers will be answered and traffic
will hold you up at a light long enough to catch your breath.
Bob and Jillian were probably shepards in a previous life as they were
always rounding up the lost lambs.
Jeff loves real estate with a particular interest in the roofs of real
estate.
Kris was trying to torment Kim as she took a route that included
passing by a VP that had coffee brewing, a pizza place (lucky for her
it was closed) and McDonalds. I wonder if McDonalds would care if they
had to swipe a debit card pulled out of a sweaty sports garment? Can
you put coffee in those hydration packs?
Hedgewood Hill...Kim had great trepidation turning onto Hedgewood as
last year when training she never never not once made it up Hedgewood
without stopping and in fact had to mostly walk up Hedgewood. This
year she made it! Why you ask ? Did she get beat and whipped up the
hill with Kris's belt and Bob's big stick? No! Was she lured up the
hill with the promises of baked goods? No! It was because she was
distracted by Bob with talk of fish oil and weight loss. Despite the
hill Kim was able to utter if it would help her to lose weight not
only would she eat fish oil but she would eat the head off of a fish.
Bob told her that would not be necessary but she should try the fish
oil capsules. Other topics of interest while going up the hill:
cookies..in particular girl scout cookies.
Jillian did not do her required task of keeping Bob occupied so that
Kim could walk up Hedgewood Hill instead of plod up it. Kim is glad
that Jillian did not do this, as now she can say "I made it up the
giant hill!" Okay it is not really a GIANT hill but it certainly is an
area that has an increasing elevation level.
It is funny Bob and Jillian are like a well oiled training machine.
We get to a hill, get up just a wee bit and then without a word they
both circle around at the same time to bring the back of the packers
up the hill.
Our 8.33 miles was a just a warm up for Jillian. She went out for more
when we got back. I think she is secretly the bionic woman.
Kim had a theory that if they fell back far enough. The shepards would
not come back for them and they could walk. That proved not to be
true. Evidently shepards are viligent about watching their flock and
shepards will let the lambs wander but only so far.
Jillian agains makes Jeff and Kim yell whoo hoo. She makes Kim repeat
whoo hooo three times before she is satified there was enough gusto in
it. Jeff is compliant and says whooo hooo in a voice loud enough the
first time to please Jillian.
Most uttered word by group:"CAR"
Kim's most frequent thought: "Where are all my friends I use to hang
out with"
Kim's thoughts on the thoughts of others:
Kris: "I gotta hurry and get back to the Y for my next cup of coffee
and I not giving any to Kim"
Jillian: "Yeah were almost back to the Y. I am gonna see if can make
Kim and Jeff black out by making them yell whooo hooo"
Bob: "I came back from Indy for this?"
Jeff: "Kim better not be praying"
***********************************
Saturday, March 22, 2007 9.2 miles for the faint of heart and 10 miles
for those of the hard core persuasion.
Attendees:
Hard Core Parties: Trainer Bob, Trainer Jillian, and Fleet Footed Jeff
Faint of Heart: Kim
Jeff was in fine form and must have ate his Wheaties AND had several
cups of Kris's magic coffee.
The route was to include more hills. Trainer Bob says Hedgewood twice
and 18th Street once. Kim gasps and says, "I have to cook dinner for
15 people on Saturday day AND have an Easter Egg Hunt I got to be able
to move" Trainer Jills says "That's crap you can take a nap when you
get home, Bob tell her that is crap" Kim, long trained in negotiations
from being the mother of teens, offers to do the hills the week after
she returns from her trip. Trainer Bob says "We will compromise and
do Hedgewood once and 18th Street once...this week" It was likely the
trainers day to switch Good Cop/Bad Cop profiles.
As mentioned above the agreement was to do Hedgewood once and 18th
street once. Kim was gleeful. Because you all know if you come uphill
it is very likely you will go downhill first. However, our town,
unique that it was laid out by drunkards, manages to make the downhill
of Hedgewood become a downhill, uphill, downhill, uphill and downhill.
Yes, that is correct uphills on our downhill portion. Of course
coming back up could it be uphill,downhill,uphill...absolutely
not...just uphill.
Traffic Lights: Somehow Bob and Jillian got in contact with the
Traffic department of our great city and arranged to have EVERY SINGLE
stoplight become green when we approached it.
Beating Stick: Trainer Bob finds his big stick (do Bob and Jillian
check out the route ahead of time and make sure there is a big stick
ready?). He nicely asks Kim,"Ok if you stop where do you wanna be
hit..the head, the back or the calves" Kim responds, "Probably my head
you will do the least damage"
18th Street Hill: Trainer Jillian withholds water from Kim. Trainer
Jillian says,"Give me your water bottle. You can have it back when you
get to the top of the hill. I don't want you to have any excuse to
stop." Kim makes it to the top of the hill does not need her water
and in fact does not want to be burdened with carrying the bottle of
water any more. Wonders if she does not mention it will Jillian lug it
all the way back to the Y? A ploy used by many children is to ask Mom
"to hold something for just a minute" and then they never come back to
get it because they don't want to carry it around...this is most often
seen at amusement parks and fairs. However, it will work quite nicely
for plodders and those that are trainers of plodders.
Hansel and Gretal: Was it Hansel and Gretal that left the trail of
breadcrumbs so they could find their way home? In this story a trail
of Jelly Beans was left. Kim was running and all of a sudden heard
"dink dink dink" Crap her Jelly Beans were rolling out of her pocket
and dropping on the sidewalk. If it had been been M&Ms she probably
would have stopped and picked them up off the ground but hey you can
get a bag of Jelly Beans for .25 on clearance now. Do you think that
Trainers Bob and Jillian would frown upon eating M&Ms during a run?
They have previously stated that no doughnuts are allowed during runs
but M&Ms have not been addressed yet.
Music Picks of the Week: Cher (If I could turn back time), Kid Rock
and Cheryl Crow (Picture) which Kim listened to like 25 times because
it is slow and she can plod and breath while listening to this song.
John Parr (Naughty Naughty) Def Lepard (Pour some sugar). Kim was
enjoying her music picks of the week untill her MP3 player died on
18th street. Jillian offers to sing for Kim but Kim knows what music
Jillian listens to and passes on that nice offer.
9th Street: Trainer Jillian says "Hey lets catch up with Trainer Bob
and Jeff by Logan" Kim grunts. By this time poor Kim could do nothing
more then grunt and moan. She moans and trainer Jillian must take that
for a yes because by the time they approach Logan they have caught up
with the guys but Kim is tired oh so tired and soon falls behind
again.
Oak Court: Kim is out of jelly beans. She has her water bottle back
again with its nasty 1/2 gatorade 1/2 water mixture. She takes a
drink. Has no desire or energy to lug her water bottle around. Sees a
huge open trash can. Throws it...completely misses it...does not
care...will not pick it up off the ground....their yard had trash in
it anyway...Kim is rude and litters when she is tired....
The end of the route appears. Jeff and Bob and Jillian want to finish
with an even 10. Kim does not care and would not have run an even 10
if there were 12 dozen boxes of girl scout cookies as a reward at the
end.
Jeff's Trash Talk: Jeff's feet were moving as fast as his mouth on
Saturday. He was running AND trash talking to the trainers. Boy is he
in trouble next Saturday when Kim is gone and unable to divert one
trainers attention. Rumor has it that next week he will be hit in the
head till he shuts up.....Its gonna be all about Jeff next week...poor
Jeff.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
GUESS WHO IS GONNA BE A DADDY AND MOMMY
JAMES AND TASHA! She will be going to the doctor next week so we will have a more specific due date!
This was a most HUGE surprise. James and Tasha came over, along with Kendra. They brought gifts for Jerry's birthday or so we thought. Now in the past people have bought us gifts to use with the grandkids so we thought nothing of it when Jerry opened up a package that had a sign that said "Baby on Board" we just thought it was because we have Adam in the car. Next Jerry opens up a gift and it is a book about grandparents. Again we are clueless. A picture frame comes out that says "Baby". Jerry and I are both looking around trying to decide which picture off the fridge we were gonna put in it. Yes we are still clueless. Then Jerry pulls out a little onsie. He looks confused. He says "This won't fit Adam". Tasha unzips her jacket. Jamie opens his...Tasha is wearing a tee shirt that says "Knocked Up" Jamie has a button that says "I did it". We stare at them and say nuh uh. I tell Jamie to quit messing with me and I continue munching on my dinner. This son has messed with me one to many times so now I believe NOTHING that he tells me. I stare at him. I stare at Tasha. She has tears in her eyes. I know she would not mess with me...We're gonna have another grandchild to love and adore! A little background...earlier that afternoon we had stopped by Jamie's house I went in to the kitchen and see prenatal vitamins on the counter. I call Jamie in and ask him "Is Tasha pregnant?" He grabs the vitamins and mutters "she better not be". He then looks at the label and he goes "Mom these are supplements. She is taking them because the have all the vitamins she needs in just one pill" Now this sounds plausible as I have known people that have done this. So when Tasha comes in I drag her in the kitchen and ask her about it (before she talked to Jamie). Somehow she comes up with the same story that Jamie gave me,"I am taking them because they have everything you need on one vitamin" I looked sad. I told her "too bad. I was kinda hoping. Oh well maybe later'
I am having shopping frenzy attacks. I can't wait to find out whether it is a pink or a blue. My poor visa card.
This was a most HUGE surprise. James and Tasha came over, along with Kendra. They brought gifts for Jerry's birthday or so we thought. Now in the past people have bought us gifts to use with the grandkids so we thought nothing of it when Jerry opened up a package that had a sign that said "Baby on Board" we just thought it was because we have Adam in the car. Next Jerry opens up a gift and it is a book about grandparents. Again we are clueless. A picture frame comes out that says "Baby". Jerry and I are both looking around trying to decide which picture off the fridge we were gonna put in it. Yes we are still clueless. Then Jerry pulls out a little onsie. He looks confused. He says "This won't fit Adam". Tasha unzips her jacket. Jamie opens his...Tasha is wearing a tee shirt that says "Knocked Up" Jamie has a button that says "I did it". We stare at them and say nuh uh. I tell Jamie to quit messing with me and I continue munching on my dinner. This son has messed with me one to many times so now I believe NOTHING that he tells me. I stare at him. I stare at Tasha. She has tears in her eyes. I know she would not mess with me...We're gonna have another grandchild to love and adore! A little background...earlier that afternoon we had stopped by Jamie's house I went in to the kitchen and see prenatal vitamins on the counter. I call Jamie in and ask him "Is Tasha pregnant?" He grabs the vitamins and mutters "she better not be". He then looks at the label and he goes "Mom these are supplements. She is taking them because the have all the vitamins she needs in just one pill" Now this sounds plausible as I have known people that have done this. So when Tasha comes in I drag her in the kitchen and ask her about it (before she talked to Jamie). Somehow she comes up with the same story that Jamie gave me,"I am taking them because they have everything you need on one vitamin" I looked sad. I told her "too bad. I was kinda hoping. Oh well maybe later'
I am having shopping frenzy attacks. I can't wait to find out whether it is a pink or a blue. My poor visa card.
It's all fun and games till Kim Keels Over Dead
Mini Training: Going quite well. Though I had to walk for a few moments during the Saturday 7.5 mile run. The week before was a Saturday 7.2 miles
Highlights of 7.2 mile run:
Jeff and Kim feel like they are going to die.
Kris finds a broken belt on the ground during the run and uses it like a whip to propel Kim forward. Kim was like a mule and disregarded the whip and continued to plod at your usual speed
Jillian ditched her cold snowy icy run to run on the beach...what was she thinking?
Bob was on his deathbed and was unable to run but somehow managed to muster up the strength to threaten to "follow us in his car if we slacked off"
Kris has burst of energy and in the last 1/2 miles says "Hey lets add some more distance on by running to the fire station istead of cutting through the school" Kim threatens to beat Kris to death with her ipod and strangle her with her headphones...the only thing that prevented this was that Kim is not fast enough to catch Kris.
Saturday 7.564 mile Highlights
First off Kudos to Kris for our awesome urban run! Truely I mean it! I am well known for my love of running thru the ghetto part of town so this route was particulary fun as we got to run thru the ghetto part of town AND run by the dump transfer station AND an old strip club that is now a Christian Coffee shop! Love it because then we have other stuff to look at!
Kim not only felt like she was going to die during this run and had at one point thought she was having an out of body experience. She saw lights.Bright Lights. Lights that seemed to beckon her forward. Fortunately for Kim it was not the lights of the great beyond but just the headlights of the sanitation truck rumbling past her.
Jillian tries to make Kim go WHOOO HOOOO in the last 1/2 mile. Kim said whooo hooo. Jillian says NO KIM! WHOOO HOOO!!!!!. Kim finally says WHOOOO HOOOO and then prompty feels faint from lack of oxygen...swears to herself that she is going WHOOOOO HOOOOO Jillian right up side her noggin but again we have the whole "Kim can't catch em" thing going on.
1/2 way thru the run Kris says, "Hey we only have like two more major turns"...like that is gonna really trick me into thinking the last half of the run is gonna be like a walk in the park.
QUOTE OF MONTH: Scenerio: Kim plodding...Jill slowing down to plod with Kim...Jill says "You know how people are always saying its about the journey and not the destination...well they have never run 7.564 miles" That ladies and gentlemen is the most true statement I have every heard!
My activities which no one really cares about but me:
The weekend before last. I had my little guy Adam on Friday night and then my big guy Ty and Carissa overnight Saturday. Friday night Adam goes to the store with Grandma and Grandpa to grocery shop...right now he thinks it is fun...in another year or so we will have to find another activity to do with him cause I think he will figure out the grocery shopping is really not fun. Saturday morning Adam and I went to the book sale at the library. Adam will not be going to any more book sales with Grandma unless we have the stroller. I tried to look at books. Adam tried to escape. I chased him, caught him, returned to the books and then we did the whole thing over and over again. He did sit during one whole story time in the youth room and he really liked it and listened most intently. That is definetly an activity we will be doing again! Saturday night when Ty and Carissa came over we had some pizza and then played some games. Tyson learned that his Grandma is a Connect 4 Champion and is also a champion Splat player. We watched a movie and so ended another fun night at Grandma and Grandpa's house.
Last weekend: Kendra and Lucas were remodeling their bathroom so we got to hang with Adam all weekend. Again for a "fun" friday night we went to Meijer. Adam must have thought it was lots of fun because when we went to leave he threw one major fit. The poor child was sobbing as if his little heart was broken...the trauma of leaving Meijers...who knew it would hurt so bad. I think I have addicted him to shopping because he did the very same thing the next day when we went to KMART complete with rolling around and thrashing on the ground so that Grandma found it near impossible to shove him into his coat. I finally managed to stuff him in his coat (now that I think back it was funny because his coat was on all cockeyed and his hat covered one whole eye and only half his head)Once I got him in the car seat then he simmered down..probably cause he thought I was gonna take him to another store! So now I gotta wean the child off shopping.
My 18 month old Grandson is a genius: Ty and I were trying to get the play station up and running. Ty messed with it. I messed with it. I finally told Ty I will fix it later. In toddles Adam. He sees us by the Play Station he comes over and hits a button on the VCR and waa laaa the Play Station comes on! He has also moved all the icons on my desktop and plays and listens to my answering machine messages. I think he is a technological genius. Finally he said Ma Maw! He says it LOUD. When we were in Walmart he kept yelling "MA MAW" even though I was only like a foot in front of him. He says "Pa Paw" but he says that in a sweet little voice but he ROARS "MA MAW"
Health:
I am back strictly on my diabetic diet. My lunch was very sad. Egg Beater omelet with fresh spinich and mushrooms and fat free cheese (fyi fat free cheese does not melt. It retains its same form no matter how hot you get it), along with the omelet I had 1/2 cup cottage cheese and some radishs. Just looking at my lunch made me want to cry and thrash around on the floor (similar to that of my grandson at KMART). My raisens in my oatmeal have gone bye bye and have been replaced with carb control no sugar added yogurt.A word of advise do not use this food combination it looked disgusting and tasted like vomit. I ate it anyway because that was the only breakfast food I had with me. Snack in the morning was a 100 calorie bag of fat free popcorn and afternoon snack was cauliflower. This better be enough to make me loose weight because my other option is to have surgery and have them remove all optional organs from my body.
My girlscouts cookies are gone. What was not consumed by me was donated (unwillingly) for our pastor's visit to our house. Now as long as I can avoid the evil girlscouts who are laying await for me at the stores I should be okay. As I have told you before girlscout are wily when it comes to peddling their fatness in a box. They hide in stores and then they POP out of NO WHERE and say "You wanna buy some cookies?" Of course they have the sweet little voices and the big eyes and the cute little sashes with badges. Before you know it you have pulled out $$$$ and have boxes of thin mints filling your arms. I swear to you I don't even remember pulling the money out of my purse...the next thing I know I am walking away with boxes of cookies. It's like mind control. Anyway I have a plan. I will cruise slowly by the front doors of the stores waving dollars out my car window. I know this will lure them out of hiding! Once they reveal themselves I will know the store is not safe for patronage and will get the heck out of dodge.
FYI: You cannot do a long training run by eating nothing but girlscout cookies the day before.
Highlights of 7.2 mile run:
Jeff and Kim feel like they are going to die.
Kris finds a broken belt on the ground during the run and uses it like a whip to propel Kim forward. Kim was like a mule and disregarded the whip and continued to plod at your usual speed
Jillian ditched her cold snowy icy run to run on the beach...what was she thinking?
Bob was on his deathbed and was unable to run but somehow managed to muster up the strength to threaten to "follow us in his car if we slacked off"
Kris has burst of energy and in the last 1/2 miles says "Hey lets add some more distance on by running to the fire station istead of cutting through the school" Kim threatens to beat Kris to death with her ipod and strangle her with her headphones...the only thing that prevented this was that Kim is not fast enough to catch Kris.
Saturday 7.564 mile Highlights
First off Kudos to Kris for our awesome urban run! Truely I mean it! I am well known for my love of running thru the ghetto part of town so this route was particulary fun as we got to run thru the ghetto part of town AND run by the dump transfer station AND an old strip club that is now a Christian Coffee shop! Love it because then we have other stuff to look at!
Kim not only felt like she was going to die during this run and had at one point thought she was having an out of body experience. She saw lights.Bright Lights. Lights that seemed to beckon her forward. Fortunately for Kim it was not the lights of the great beyond but just the headlights of the sanitation truck rumbling past her.
Jillian tries to make Kim go WHOOO HOOOO in the last 1/2 mile. Kim said whooo hooo. Jillian says NO KIM! WHOOO HOOO!!!!!. Kim finally says WHOOOO HOOOO and then prompty feels faint from lack of oxygen...swears to herself that she is going WHOOOOO HOOOOO Jillian right up side her noggin but again we have the whole "Kim can't catch em" thing going on.
1/2 way thru the run Kris says, "Hey we only have like two more major turns"...like that is gonna really trick me into thinking the last half of the run is gonna be like a walk in the park.
QUOTE OF MONTH: Scenerio: Kim plodding...Jill slowing down to plod with Kim...Jill says "You know how people are always saying its about the journey and not the destination...well they have never run 7.564 miles" That ladies and gentlemen is the most true statement I have every heard!
My activities which no one really cares about but me:
The weekend before last. I had my little guy Adam on Friday night and then my big guy Ty and Carissa overnight Saturday. Friday night Adam goes to the store with Grandma and Grandpa to grocery shop...right now he thinks it is fun...in another year or so we will have to find another activity to do with him cause I think he will figure out the grocery shopping is really not fun. Saturday morning Adam and I went to the book sale at the library. Adam will not be going to any more book sales with Grandma unless we have the stroller. I tried to look at books. Adam tried to escape. I chased him, caught him, returned to the books and then we did the whole thing over and over again. He did sit during one whole story time in the youth room and he really liked it and listened most intently. That is definetly an activity we will be doing again! Saturday night when Ty and Carissa came over we had some pizza and then played some games. Tyson learned that his Grandma is a Connect 4 Champion and is also a champion Splat player. We watched a movie and so ended another fun night at Grandma and Grandpa's house.
Last weekend: Kendra and Lucas were remodeling their bathroom so we got to hang with Adam all weekend. Again for a "fun" friday night we went to Meijer. Adam must have thought it was lots of fun because when we went to leave he threw one major fit. The poor child was sobbing as if his little heart was broken...the trauma of leaving Meijers...who knew it would hurt so bad. I think I have addicted him to shopping because he did the very same thing the next day when we went to KMART complete with rolling around and thrashing on the ground so that Grandma found it near impossible to shove him into his coat. I finally managed to stuff him in his coat (now that I think back it was funny because his coat was on all cockeyed and his hat covered one whole eye and only half his head)Once I got him in the car seat then he simmered down..probably cause he thought I was gonna take him to another store! So now I gotta wean the child off shopping.
My 18 month old Grandson is a genius: Ty and I were trying to get the play station up and running. Ty messed with it. I messed with it. I finally told Ty I will fix it later. In toddles Adam. He sees us by the Play Station he comes over and hits a button on the VCR and waa laaa the Play Station comes on! He has also moved all the icons on my desktop and plays and listens to my answering machine messages. I think he is a technological genius. Finally he said Ma Maw! He says it LOUD. When we were in Walmart he kept yelling "MA MAW" even though I was only like a foot in front of him. He says "Pa Paw" but he says that in a sweet little voice but he ROARS "MA MAW"
Health:
I am back strictly on my diabetic diet. My lunch was very sad. Egg Beater omelet with fresh spinich and mushrooms and fat free cheese (fyi fat free cheese does not melt. It retains its same form no matter how hot you get it), along with the omelet I had 1/2 cup cottage cheese and some radishs. Just looking at my lunch made me want to cry and thrash around on the floor (similar to that of my grandson at KMART). My raisens in my oatmeal have gone bye bye and have been replaced with carb control no sugar added yogurt.A word of advise do not use this food combination it looked disgusting and tasted like vomit. I ate it anyway because that was the only breakfast food I had with me. Snack in the morning was a 100 calorie bag of fat free popcorn and afternoon snack was cauliflower. This better be enough to make me loose weight because my other option is to have surgery and have them remove all optional organs from my body.
My girlscouts cookies are gone. What was not consumed by me was donated (unwillingly) for our pastor's visit to our house. Now as long as I can avoid the evil girlscouts who are laying await for me at the stores I should be okay. As I have told you before girlscout are wily when it comes to peddling their fatness in a box. They hide in stores and then they POP out of NO WHERE and say "You wanna buy some cookies?" Of course they have the sweet little voices and the big eyes and the cute little sashes with badges. Before you know it you have pulled out $$$$ and have boxes of thin mints filling your arms. I swear to you I don't even remember pulling the money out of my purse...the next thing I know I am walking away with boxes of cookies. It's like mind control. Anyway I have a plan. I will cruise slowly by the front doors of the stores waving dollars out my car window. I know this will lure them out of hiding! Once they reveal themselves I will know the store is not safe for patronage and will get the heck out of dodge.
FYI: You cannot do a long training run by eating nothing but girlscout cookies the day before.
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