Running???what is that???

Okay confession from a slacker. I have only run 5 miles the whole week. I am gonna pay for that come tomorrow morning when I meet up with the climate run team and I have to do 5 IN ONE RUN. Starting tomorrow it is back on the wagon...I mean road....in my new aasics...which I adore.....The cookies have settled in around my waist, the chocolate has found my thighs and everything else has just settled in random spots on my body. I think Santa would find me sexy right now. Let me introduce myself: My name is Kim and I am a Cookieaholic. It started with just one snickerdoodle (which from what my mother tells me was her favorite cookie to bake when I was young) just one snickerdoodle at such a young age and the addiction began. What is one cookie when you are so young...one homebaked cookie made with love.....I will tell you that fatness is started on a road paved with good intentions and motherly love....now I can't stop....I will be out of commission for awhile while I am going thru cookie detox (yet again)...I cannot be approached with anything resembling a cookie or I could go into complete cookie shock...or I may go mad and attack the holder of the cookie, I will be unable to clean house as I may come across a stray christmas cookie left behind by some silly silly person that is indifferent to cookies, I will not be able to go to the Mall unless they barricade the cookie shop, I will not be attending church services as they may serve communion and the wafers appear cookie like, there will be no stop at the coffee shop as they try to entice me with their trays of cookies next to the coffee dispensers, I will have to have grocery delivery as I don't think I can make it down the baking aisle at the grocery without throwing in the 50% off bags of chocolate chips (which will then be turned into cookies)...mine will be a sad lonely existence as I battle my demon....I guess I better start running.....Don't take it personally if I snarl at you....its not really me...its my addiction...by March I should be okay......

On Holiday Weight Gain/Cookie Consumption

Alice In Wonderland: "Oh, I'm not particular as to size, only one doesn't like changing so often, you know."

And that my friends sums up Holiday weight gain.

I HAVE MY VERY OWN STALKER

Yes, I know it is hard to believe. Chubby wife, mother of three, grandmother of three, the plodding Athena warrior goddess has her very own stalker. I have been stalked since October. Three whole months of constant stalking. Is it getting to me...yes...am I near the breaking point...yes....do I know my stalker....yes.....it is




Fanny May. She sends me flyers, she sends me emails on a daily basis and NOW she has stepped up her assault. She has Emailed me BOGOs! Ack Fanny May Buy One Get One Free. She is the devil underneath a coating of smooth chocolatey goodness. I am at the point where I am contemplating changing my email address and moving out of town but I guess there is no point...she will find me....she always finds me......

My new Theme Song!

I found a song that is even better then "Fat Bottomed Girls" I love this song! It is my new I love myself anthem! You might have to cut and paste it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tcRiXOONqf0

On a Snowy Snowy Day

Exactly 26 years ago I was giving birth to my second son. It was snowy. It was cold. The only vehicle we had was the company van my husband was driving that had one seat for the driver and the passenger a/k/a in labor woman a/k/a me had to sit on a kitchen chair. The roads were slick and the van fishtailed all over the road, I am still to this day not sure if the fishtailing was accidental or just caused by an overenthusiastic snow driver a/k/a husband of woman in labor. All I know was I was in labor and clutching the sides of the kitchen chair and wondering if we would make it to the hospital (which was really only about 5 minutes away but seemed like 5 hours). My poor husband it took all his begging and pleading and telephone calls to my mother to get me to go to the hospital. I was adamant I was NOT going to the hospital. I hated the hospitals. I hated the doctors. I knew this was gonna hurt and for some reason in my demented mind I thought if I did not go to the hospital I could bypass the whole "hurts really bad labor". I told my husband I was not leaving. I was not going to the hospital ever! He was frantic. He pleaded with me to please get in the van and go the hospital. I clung to the bathroom door declaring quite loudly, "I am NOT GOING TO THE HOSPITAL" He tried to reason with me. I was unreasonable. Finally, under the pressure of my husband and the threats of my mother I was coerced into the van. I made it to the hospital. I was right it did hurt. However, the pain was well worth it because Jamie came into the world. Now of course you all know him as James but he was Jamie to me from the day he was born and will be Jamie to me until the day I die. He was dark. He was hairy. He had a cleft in his chin just like his Grandpa Chuck. Without a doubt Groleau blood was in him. Jamie was colicky. Aunt Denise was about the only one who could calm him down. He spent the first year of his life in a baby swing in hopes of lulling him into a sweet happy mood. To this day I have a big bulging bicep from the constant winding up of the baby swing. In those days we did not have auto swings. It was crank, crank, crank, baby happy, swing stop, baby unhappy, crank, crank, crank, baby happy and so on and so on.

1) Had the biggest brownest eyes you have ever seen in your life! He would look at me with tear filled eyes and I would feel like the biggest meaniest baddest mommy in the world for scolding him.
2) I would come downstairs in the middle of the night and he would be perched on the kitchen countertop with a spoon in the peanut butter having himself a little midnight snack. He has had a lifelong love affair with peanut butter.
3)Colored monsters on my bedroom wall with red lipstick (which by the way does not get repaired by merely painting over it). He comes running out of my room, lipstick on his hand saying "I'm in big touble now" (yes he did not put an R in trouble). Grandpa Groleau was there that day and that became his favorite story to tell. And yes Jamie was in "Big Touble" but see number one for why he did not get spanked.
4) Had his own sense of style at a young age he became a dandy dresser. A trait he still has to this day. Jamie, as an adult, often says "Man I look good" His style was to wear three to four shirts each one progressively shorter over a pair of slightly baggy jeans. (not real baggy, just little boy skinny baggy). His top shirt of choice for several years were his football jerseys.
5)Liked to dig in the dirt and bury GI Joes and Matchbox Cars. Several years ago I unearthed a matchbox car. It brought tears to my eyes.
6)Always had dirty knees. I swear the dirt was permanently embedded. I should probably check out his knees today. I bet they are still dirty.
7) One day he came running into the house. He so very excited. He had a present for Mom. One of the neighbors was throwing out a Food Shredder (an electric one). He saw it and brought it home to me. I still have it to this day and cannot bear the thought of getting rid of it (and it still works and I use it at least once a year).
8) Jamie was a laughing happy kid. I got called to the school because he was being the class clown. He was not laughing when I got to school. He as unhappy. He told the principal "She's gonna kill me" The principal was talking to me while Jamie was sitting outside the principal office's by the secretary. He was laughing when he was telling me Jamie was begging him not to call me because "she would kill me" He said, "Are you gonna kill him" I laughed and said "Nah but he's gonna get a pretty good spanking". See number one as to why he did not get spanked. Jamie was advised not to be the class clown anymore. He never really quit but he did not ever cross the getting his parents called to school line.
9) Was always winning stuff. Won a bike, won autographed footballs...just would win stuff...
Opened up the paper one day and there was my son's picture in the Journal and Courier. A picture of him and his little friend sitting on the monkey bars looking out with telescopes.
10) Now this story he had a partner in crime, his older brother, I got up one morning to find one totally white Jamie...all white...just big brown eyes peering out of a powdered covered face. Every white powdery substance in my canisters had been emptied out onto my kitchen floor. He was probably 2 1/2 at the time of the incident. Flour, baking soda, salt EVERYWHERE. In the cracks of the floor and flourery footsteps through out the house. Little white powdery boy got dumped unceremoniously into the bath tub. Mean old Mommy did not care that powdery little boy was not at all happy about being dropped into a bathtub. Mean old Mommy disregarded the shrieks of unhappiness as he had cup after cup of water poured over his head. (Which actually made the flour even more difficult to get out as it "gummed up")

Oh bonus story: He cut the head off my chicken.

As with all my children I have so many stories I could write for hours and hours. Jamie was a good boy and he is a good man. His father says I must stop referring to him as Jamie. I do call him James but in my mind he is Jamie. He has a heart that is full of compassion though he tries his very best to cover it up! He still has the big brown eyes and the cute mischievous smile. You can always count on him if you need him! We love you Jamie and are very proud of you...oops I mean we love you James and are very proud of you.

Love Mean Old Mommy

Sleighs Bells Jingling, Jing Jing Jingling

Today is the YMCA Sleighbell 5k. I have my packet with my shirt and my little jingle bells to put on my shoes. I HATE the jingle bells. I like them on other peoples feet but I deplore them on mine because I then have to listen to the sounds of my labored breathing AND the sounds of my jingle bells as they jingle in a very un rhythmic like jingle. We also have a timing chip! Very cool because in the past we have never had such a thing. So I have had my oatmeal and tablespoon of peanut butter because I cannot go from the day before till after 10:00 a.m to eat. I wish we could start our run at 7:30 a.m. By 9:00am I am well into my morning. I have decided since races freak me out and I panic that I am not gonna worry about time I am just going to have fun with my friends.
I had a really good food week until Friday night...all week...I was such a good girl...thought I was gonna starve to death...but I hung in there. I am going to try to maintain some self control this weekend.

December 5: Is my eldest son's birthday. We will be having him over for dinner tonight because his birthday falls on Wed and it is just too difficult to do a birthday dinner in the middle of the week.
Thoughts on Brad: When we had you we were very young( I had just turned 18 and your father was 19) and we had no idea on how to raise a child. Your father and I likely made every mistake in the book and probably invented new mistakes while raising you but despite the errors made by your parents you thrived and became the awesome person you are today. We are proud that your are a hardworking man and an amazing father. Everytime we see you with your children we marvel at the tenderness and love that pours out of you.
Facts about Brad:
1) Baby Language for Drink of Water "AH DO WAH" and want to go outside (phrased used while banging on the screen door) "AH DO WEEE"
2) Called Bull Dozers "Pickem Up Muddies"
3)Your father liked to play pool in the basement so anytime you would hear pool balls clank you would say "Daddy Daddy"
4) Threw a golf ball at the neighbor's door while walking to school (nothing broke). The neighbor called the police and the police came to our house. I told them you were at school (yes I ratted you out to teach you a lesson) they went to school and told you not to throw golf balls at people's doors. You never threw a golf ball at another person's house after that.
5)When you were a toddler you got into Grandma's Crisco and covered her cabinet door with Crisco (and yes it was hard to get off).
6) One Christmas you and Jamie got up early (before your parents) on Christmas and opened every Christmas present under the tree..EVERY SINGLE ONE
7) Put a dent in the aluminum siding on our house and it is still there today
8)Every teacher you ever had loved you and said you were the most quiet polite child they had ever seen...I still don't know if they had you mixed up with another child because you were never quiet at home.
9) You would often surprise me by having the kitchen cleaned up for me. I still remember one Thanksgiving the house was a disaster when I went to bed and when I woke up a sparkling clean kitchen was there.
10)Got into a gallon of red paint when you were about one or so. I was doing laundry in the basement...you were in the corner...I thought playing with your toys...in fact you had opened a can of paint and painted yourself. I had a little trouble getting the red paint out of your blond hair. You were slightly pink for a couple days after that.

I have lots more but I think you would be horrified if I put them in writing...my very favorite I won't write but a hint...scooby doo underwear...

Brad we love you and are very proud of you!

Okay off to to do the Jingle Bell Trot........

Upcoming Events: Amanda's Baby Shower (Sunday), Brad's Bday, December 8 Craft night at Grandma and Grandpa's House, My Dad's Bday, Snoozys Bday, Aunt Hee Hees Bday, Jamie's BDay, (wow thats alot of Bday Cake), Julianna's expected arrival date (yet another December BDay cake...I am surprised we don't gain 20 pounds during December just from Birthday Cake consumption), Christmas Eve (my house at 5:00), Christmas Day (lunch served around 12-1),

I RUN FOR PIE

Thanksgiving morning started out with the Gluttony Gobbler Gallop. 3.5 miles with some of the best friends a girl could ask for. 3.5 miles earned me one piece of pie. Unfortunately, my pie consumption far exceeded what I earned. My pants and shirts all feel slightly snug..okay really snug...due to my thanksgiving excess. I must now run, measure food and count food to make up for my gluttony. This week I am sure I am going to suffer terribly from food withdrawal. We had a fantastic Thanksgiving. Before the game playing commenced we plotted out our "Black Friday" strategy. (Black Friday is the happiest shopping day of the year...more details to follow below) After plotting our Black Friday strategy we played my new game "Are you smarter then a Fifth Grader" I am almost as smart as a fifth grader but due to our (me and Tasha) inability to answer "How fast is the speed of sound" We did not graduate fifth grader. My son and mother are not even as smart as a first grader cause they could not answer "What did Winken, Blinken and Nod sail off in" I think Jamie should be removed from his position of power at his place of employment and be put in a menial job that requires no education whatsoever. We ended our night by playing scattorgories which is a blast.


Black Friday: Mine and Kendra's strategy was to acquire four specific items of which the names cannot be disclosed on account of Christmas Secret Code of Honor. I was sent to Meijer to obtain a LCD TV (of which the identity may be disclosed because it was a present from me and Jerry to ourselves). She was going to get in line at Target. The plan was for me to make my purchase then hot foot it over to Target and hook up with Kendra. I reached Meijer at 4:10 a.m to be directed to stand in a line (inside the store) and wait till they distributed the items. As I waited in line no one would talk to me...why would people not talk to me??? Because.... and here is the story....I jumped in my care at 4:00 a.m. On my way to Meijer I started smelling this horrible smell...I thought it must be the air because we have a stinky stinky factory in town... and sometimes the stench wafts it way to our area of town, I thought uck this whole stupid town smells....so I get to Meijers thinking good I am indoors that horrendous smell will go away...walked thru Meijers...still smelled it....thought OH NO I THINK IT IS COMING FROM ME! I looked down and sure enough my shoe is covered in dog poo...it is embedded in the bottom of my shoe and squished all over the side...somebody had let their stupid dog poo right in front of my car door...ick yuck I smelled bad...too late though I was not going to miss my line to get my $150 TV (save $180) so I stood in line...much to my discomfort as well as those around me. I got out of Meijers and was going to head to Target but I could not stand my own smell...thought that's okay I have another pair of shoes in the car I will just switch..discovered the shoes I had were my heeled boots..which are less then comfortable...they are more for slenderize my legs effect then comfortable walking...so I wear them and proceed to shop in the slenderizing but killing feet boots....Now Target....hah I should have worn my dog poop shoes because then maybe I would not have been pushed and shoved and told to "Get out of my way" by some very hefty angry woman...boy she would have gotten it good if I had not been in my work clothes...did not want to get blood on my office clothes...so I had to settle for giving her a dirty look and my I am gonna kick you butt eye squint... she says "Soooooorrry" in a very NOT sorry voice....and can you really be sorry when you deliberately put both your hands on someone's back and PUSH and then say "GET OUT OF MY WAY"? Anyway kudos to Kendra who like magic disappeared and reappeared holding the cannot be named items...she grabbed my arm and said lets go get the other stuff and next thing I knew we were by the other items that cannot be named and threw a few in my cart....after that off in hot pursuit for Giggle and Go Garage (we can mention this because neither Adam or Carissa can read)but alas the Giggle and Go Garages were swooped off the shelves by frantic Christmas Mothers. Target had every check out line open so we got in and out in time for us to stop at the EVIL McDonalds for a quick bite to eat and me to get to work by 7:55 a.m. I told my boss that I have requested off next Black Friday and it was crucial that I be off because no Black Friday shopping for three years could result in convulsions and then a coma like state which would ultimately mean I would get no work done so I might as well be off. She's a good sport and said okay! I was so so so sad to be at my desk on Black Friday and felt light headed...I told her if she saw me turn pale and start to shake to just stick a credit card in my hand and tell me "It's okay...Kimmie...your'e at the Mall".

Quote of the Day: "Yeah your real tuff...you said "The weak shall fall and the strong shall survive"and then you whine, "Somebody pushed me" Spoken by my daughter when I told her that I was pushed in Target.

What were you doing November 24 1984?

I was on the labor table delivering who is quite possibly the most awesome, beautiful, smartest daughter ever in the whole wide world...

Random Facts about the Most Possibly Awesome Beautiful Smartest Daughter Ever:
1) She was breastfed till she was almost one year old

2) She called her brothers the Bobos and has uttered more then once "I hate the Bobos"

3)Learned to ride an adult 10 speed while she was in kindergarton...she was so small she had to lay it down on a hill to get on it.

4) Refused to eat red jello for months because her brother told her red jello was made from blood..everytime I served it she would just look at it and cry.

5) Made her barbies physically mature by drawing on them with ink pens. ( I threw them away after that)

6)Told the checkout lady at Marsh Grocery Store that I was her foster mother and I was mean ( I AM her biological mother). The lady looked at me like I was the Devil.

7)She had a mad infatuation with Jonathon Taylor Thomas and the Back Street Boys

8) Wrote a hate letter to her father that said "I hate you. You are a Big Meenie" and then signed it "Love your Little Princess" The note was slid under our bedroom door

9) Was nicknamed "The Woman" by her GMA Carnahan

10)Wrote the following in her diary: "Ricky and Timmy asked my why I was wearing a training bra when I did not need one...I told my mom...she said to ignore them...what kind of mother is she"

10)She sat by my side and rubbed my head saying "I love you Mommy don't cry" when I had my wisdom teeth pulled and was laying on the couch in pain.

11) She learned to count by helping me make formula bottles for my babies when I had my daycare

12) A box of her childhood memories is upstairs in my spare room and she WON'T come and get it.

13)Begged and begged to play the clarinet in the 6th grade. I finally caved in and bought the clarinet and let her join band. She played for one year and wanted to quit. I told her she was not quitting until I got my $1000.00 worth of toots out of that thing. She played until the end of 8th grade. She still refuses to pay the clarinet and has "lost" it.

14) She was a daisy, a brown and a girlscout

15) She has her drivers license number memorized...who does that?

16) Made me a Grandma...thus filling my life with joy...oh yeah it was filled with joy just by being her Mom... she just overflowed my joy level by giving me Adam.

To my daughter with all my love.
Love
Momma

Toe Cubes

Today will likely be my last morning bike ride. I jumped on my bike...actually even wore a jacket, a hat and gloves...as a concession to my flu recovery ....had on my nice Aasics which are just lovely in the summer with their nice vents...had on my nice thin running socks....2 1/2 miles later my toes became toe cubes. My feet were so cold they hurt. Finally stopped, took off my shoes and placed my gloves over my toes and put my shoes back on...felt quite strange but it somewhat warmed them up. I got home and parts of my toes were white and part red. I panicked thinking I had frostbite. My honey told me if it was frostbite they would be black and what did I expect when I was out bike riding in 27 degree weather. So I guess no more below 30 bike rides for me unless I am properly attired.
My flu recovery has played havoc with my miles. I suffered thru 3 miles on Monday...walk, run, walk, run, complain about running, walk some more etc....mostly complaining about running. Tuesday was a little better. Got on the treadmill, walked for .25 mile, ran as fast as could for a few minutes, jogged then walked for about 1.25 miles..felt like gouging my eyeballs out and beating my head on the console with boredom...got off went outside (I was staying inside b/c of flu recovery) said did not care if I got sick again was going outside and finished up 2.35 outside..steady no walking...though I broke no speed records for sure.
Today I biked...see toe cube story above but prior to my bike ride..I cleaned out my fridge thus avoiding future botulism cases and gave my stinky mangy dog a bath and cleaned out his disgustingly seepy ears...how is that for a way to start a day...my life is full of glamour.

Tomorrow is climate run..don't know if I can keep up as I am still kinda tired....5 miles on the agenda...

46 MORE SHOPPING DAYS TILL CHRISTMAS

My credit card is hot to the touch!

I FEEL PRETTY OH SO PRETTY

One random run in with a sick person on Tuesday and Boom by Thursday morning I am sick. As I walked in to work Thursday morning people stared at me, they stepped away from me...they said "EWWWW are you sick?" Yes yes yes I was sick. I looked like an extra from the Day of the Dead. My skin was pasty and white, my eyes glazed over, my walk reduced to an Igor like shuffle and I was snorting and sniffling like a potbellied pig. I stayed for two hours till my boss arrived and said, "GO HOME and GO TO BED!" Which I gladly did. I got into my finest "I am sick attire" which consist of my oversized running pants and a long sleeved tee shirt which declares me a 5k Jingle Bell participant. I set up "sick central" with the necessary box of kleenx and jar of vicks vapor rub. I then draped myself quite attractively across the couch and begin to litter the coffee table with a mountain of used klennex. How could any man resist the lovliness of this vision? Not to mention the the scent of vicks vapor rub coming off of my feverish body must have been incredible inticing. Of course when I am sick the thought of vegtables and fruit makes me feel sick...what did my body crave? Halloween Candy. The mountain of used klennex was only rivaled by the GIGANTIC mountain of candy wrappers next to it. No chicken soup for this girl no siree healing comes in the form of snickers, m&ms, red licorce, bit o honeys and then for dessert cheap vanilla creame cookies (yes the generic brand..something I am normally far to snobby to eat). The candy medicine must really work b/c with a little effort and alot of aleve cold and sinus I was able to make it to work yesterday...but barely...I still felt like crap and came home and went to bed after I took one dose of fun sized snicker bar and fun sized M&M. Today I feel good enough to try to run which is what I am suppose to be doing now. I swear though when I finish this post I am out the door. So to sum up my sick experience I will list the things necessary for healing:

Large Comfy Clothes
Soft Blanket
Couch
TV with soap operas playing hour after hour
Vicks Vapor Rub
Kleenex
Halloween Candy (Christmas or Easter may be substituted)
Cookies (any type)
Remote Control for the TV WITHIN AN ARMS REACH
Niquel and not the daytime stuff either...its gotta be the hard stuff. The stuff that you have to take like a shot and then you gasp for breath....
Bonus Item: Husband that is willing to run out and get you stuff as needed...I was lucky I had the Bonus Item!

Updates:
Fall Festival at Work: My company/division had a fall festival party. It was great fun. My grandson Ty won third place in the costume contest and then won the "Wrap your Grandma Like a Mummy" game. He was giddy with his third place prize b/c it was a pumpkin full of candy!!!! I thought he would keel over with joy when he looked in that pumpkin. Baby Adam got beat out in the costume contest by a 4 year old Dorothy of the Wizard of Oz...He should have won he made one fantastic Baby Frankensein. We did a Hay ride which both Ty and Adam enjoyed. Ty also found that it is not fun sitting in the back seat of the car with Adam because he uses his pacifer on rope like a sling. Ty got really good at ducking. He said it worse then sitting in the back seat with his little sister.

Halloween: Baby Frankenstein appeared at my house as did Eyeore. I was not aware that Frankenstein liked potatos, sausage and greenbeans but he did. Eyeore was evidently saving herself for candy b/c she did not want to eat.

Fort K: The final stages of Fort K have commenced. Jerry has the posts up for the rest of our privacy fence and he will put the panels on today. We will then be a fully safe yard for toddlers and children to run amuck.

KUDOS: Daughter in Law has become a working mom. She started a new full time job this week! Good Luck Nat!

Anniversaries: Tasha and James 1 year! Kendra and Lucas 2 years!

Upcoming Events: Thanksgiving! 1:00 Thanksgiving day...I will be in contact with you to ask what dish you will be bringing. Black Friday..I am going out but I have to be at work by 8:10 at the latest...so I am up for shopping at 4:00 a.m., Jingle Bell 5k, Christmas Ornament Craft Night and Christmas Eve and Christmas Day...have you got your shopping started? I have!

This Girl Just Wants to Have Fun

I have been such a bad bad blogger lately! Last weekend we went to the Feast of the Hunters Moon. I love the feast...the smell of firewood, the cool crisp morning, the smell of all the food and the sound of the bagpipes. I usually eat myself around the feast till I go into a food coma. Somewhat like Templeton from Charlotte's Webb when he goes to the fair...okay EXACTLY like Templton. This year I did much better. I was there all day and only ate two scottish shortbread cookies, one bridie and a buffalo burger! That was it!!! It was an amazing feat of self control! After we went to the feast we took off to the wilds of the countryside in an attempt to catch our nasty messy trespassers. It seems to be that our family's country oasis has become a party zone. But we will catch them! Oh yes we will! My husband and son have made it their mission. At any rate we did not find our trespasser last week (or this week either) but they have been out there and dumped trash on my husbands fire pit which has made him most unhappy. Okay so back in town we came because it was time to get to be Grandma and Grandpa! Yeah! He is such a sweet heart. He is walking now! Walking more then crawling. He is a little ball of energy! Grandma and Grandpa got to keep him overnight and so Sunday morning Grandma made him homemade waffles, sausage and eggs. He loved it! He went to Sunday School and hung out with his friends and then back home for some yummy grilled cheese sandwich, chicken noodle soup (which he was not overly thrilled with) and some Mandarin orange slices...then play time till he got irritated, threw a little fit, bonked his head during the fit and then promptly was taken to playpen for nap time. Then off to a football game to watch Ty play. Adam will watch football but Adam also has the attention span of a flea (which is about right for his age) so Grandma pulled him around in his wagon while simultaneously watching Ty play. Carissa thought the wagon looked like so much fun that she hitched a ride as well! Ty played very well but unfortunately the team they played was undefeated so the game ended for Ty in a loss but he played very well and he takes his hits like a trooper! While I was at the game I got to check out the brillance of my granddaughter Carissa. She has discovered that you get more food if you do not share. I had brought little gerber cheese puffs and opened them and put the can between Adam and Carissa. She grabs the can, gives ONE puff to Adam (cause she is a thoughtful girl) and then takes off with the can. I laugh, cause it was funny and reminded me of myself (still to this day). I told her she had to share and she quite willingly brought the can over AFTER stuffing a bunch in her mouth and hands!

Covered Bridge Festival: Attended the Covered Bridge Festival on Thursday with my sister and my pregnant neice. We had a nice time, picked up a few Christmas presents, and best of all no whining from my neice Amanda, who is not a fan of walking when she is not pregnant, so to walk the entire day while Pregnant, well that was AMAZING.
QUOTE OF THE DAY AT THE COVERED BRIDGE: Scenerio: Just finished breakfast at some type of old man Lodge(you know the kind where there is a constant cloud of cigarrette smoke, plastic tablecloths on the tables, and an ashtray on every table and in every nook and cranny of the building)..biscuits and gravy...yummmy...bad kim bad kim...went to get a toothpick...scruffy old man sitting next to the counter with the toothpicks says, "You don't need no toothpick if you ain't got no teeth like me" He then proceeds to hee haw at his cleverness...I laugh and respond yeah I guess your right...and then prayed that he was not the one that had prepared my biscuits and gravy. Though I must say they were the some of the best biscuits and gravy I have every had (except mine and my sister's..despite the fact that she insists on using biscuits in a tube)

RANT OVER TUBE PRODUCTS: I have told my sister over and over if you are going to go the trouble to make homemade gravy of such yumminess that you might as well go the extra mile and MAKE your biscuits. It is just not right to use biscuits from a tube...what kinda loves does that show by slapping buscuits on a table when all you did was whack a tube on the counter and toss them in the oven. None I tell you none! I also have a thing about meat in a tube..except sausage...hamburger should never never never be put in a tube and I refuse to buy it. They now sell hamburger in small, medium and large tubes...bleck......

QUOTE OF THE DAY FROM A VERY CUTE KID: My husband and I were sitting on the couch with my 5 year old neice. She is coloring in a book she got at a festival. The one you get from the police that talks about never talking to stranger. So my husband is talking to her about strangers and she assures us that no she does not talk to strangers because "They will grab you, kidnap you and cook you in a STEW" What on earth has my sister been telling this child?

Workouts: Slipped a the lastweek and did not get my 20 in. Was .5 miles short of 20 this week. Had to reevaluate AGAIN. Running 5 days was killing my knee and foot. Bumped back to Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday. Climate Run was great. Friday run was great. I have a new running partner on random Fridays. Monday was speed work and Tuesday was a slow steady boring six on the Dreadmill. Had lots of rain this week so not much biking to the Y. Will get twenty in this week! Possible more!

Time to read the paper and get ready for church!

What I do on my day off

TOUCHDOWN

SCORE! My grandson made a touchdown and made the extra! He was on fire today! Tackles, Gained Yards, great blocks,he played hard and aggressive! Went right from a handoff into an awesome block! When he scored I had to remember that I was holding Adam I was so proud and happy I was jumping up and down and likely blew my poor baby grandbaby's ears out with my yelling. Watching him play hard and aggressive brought tears to this Grandma's eyes. GOOD JOB TY! You should have seen him barrelling thru the opposing team's offensive line. He did fantastic looking for holes to get thru while quarterbacking. I kept telling baby Adam you getting this little grasshopper....

ADAM: Is walking! He does a nice little Frankenstein walk....so cute. He spent the night with us on Saturday and accompanied us to our church's Hobo Stew. He loved the hobo stew and we took the wagon so we pulled him and his little friend around in the wagon.

Upcoming events: Ghost Tales, Feast of the Hunter's Moon, Covered Bridge Festival...fun fun fun for Kim!

I LOVE MY________

One of my magazines, I think it is Good Housekeeping, and yes I know that implies that I might be interested in good housekeeping which of course I am not, usually has an interview with a celebrity and they wear a shirt that says I love my _____, and they are to fill in the blank. Some stars said "life" "family" "dog" so I made list, which is in no particular order

I love my______

God, Husband, Children, Grandchildren, mother, and co-mothers, dad and co-dad, grandma, my sisters, my neices, MYSELF (what a suprise), my climate run group, my Y friends, my job, dinner time, snack time, breakfast time (starting to see a pattern?), lucky running socks, donkey legs, asic 1110s, mp3player, sugar free jello, ability to find the cookies Jerry tries to hide, heart rate monitor, hair colorist that keeps me brunette, Earl Park Bingo Binge, Earl Park Eat Like A Pig Binge, spinning class, road trips with my sisters.... Please feel free to comment and leave your own :"I love my ____"

10 fun Kim Facts

1) I can eat an entire box of Cheese Nips in one sitting

2) I was a waitress for many years and LOVED IT.

3) I refused to go the hospital while in labor with my second son and my husband had to drag me kicking and screaming to the hospital.

4) I love Rock of Love

5) I fell asleep in the bathroom at church

6) I love the Enquirer and someday the knowlege I have gained from this magazine will pay off...I just know it.


7) I do not cry during sad movies


8) I laugh really hard at funny movies


9) I forget to shift and often take corners in 4th gear (which makes my husband cringe and say your gonna burn your tranny out)


10) I love to shop at the Dollar Tree shhhhhh that's a secret though because when most people ask I tell them my favorite store is Macy's.

Update: My newest skill acquired...Now I can run faster then tail light walks! hahahaha Tail Light a/k/a Jill

A Pondering: Why do parents ask their children if they want a spanking? I too have been guilty of this and never once did my kids say "Yes, please a really hard one" so I guess since we know the answer is gonna be no we should just stop asking.

An Absolutism from Kim: One should never never never consume an entire box of shredded wheat in one feeding.

Things one doesn't want to see: A husband with his foot in an air cast, up in a tree with a saw. If you ask what he is doing he will probably say, "Getting firewood"

Another thing you don't want to see: Your stupid dog laying UNDERNEATH the tree with the man and the saw.

Working Out: My runs have been AWESOME. Other then the two cars that tried to run me over, the dead animal I almost ran thru and big giant hill I enjoyed them so much I almost want to cry. Now don't get me wrong by awesome I do not mean speedy but rather it gave me this incredible sense of "Wow I love my life"

Well time to go I am suppose to be paying bills but just got a tad bit side tracked......

Heart Walk and other news!

Do you remember what it was like to have this much fun?

Ahhh to be nine again!

He probably wouldn't bat an eye if Freddy Kruger held him but the clown...now that's another story.

The Heart Walk: Natalie gave a wonderful speech that brought tears to my eyes. The kids had a great time as there were clowns, a playground and games. It was such a beautiful day for a walk and what a worthy cause. Thank you to all the people that donated money for the walk!

Abby's Birthday: Abby is now a big 5 years old and so excited about all her birthday gifts. We had a nice time at the party. Grandma jumped on the trampoline...believe it or not that is a real cardiac workout if you jump pretty high. My dismount off the trampoline was a little less then graceful. Ty tried to tell me that doing a flip was easy and I should try it. I told him I would take his word for it and leaving the flipping to him. Carissa loved the trampoline and it sent her into fits of giggles (for safety nut people...the trampoline is encased by a safety net).

Fitness updates: I am on track and have completed 19.5 miles of running for this week...next week 20! I believe I am going to do the Benton County YMCA 5k this weekend as I am going to miss the Pumpkin Push. 16+ miles of biking completed! So my four day a week running plan has been so far successful!

Upcoming events: Lucas Birthday, Feast of the Hunters Moon, Covered Bridge (no men folk allowed). I am also going to be scheduling a "Family Hobo Stew" watch for details.

What Doesn't Kill You will Just Hurt You Real Bad

Fitness:
I have determined after watching my belly shake (I am sure to the envy of Santa) that my workout regime must be kicked up. No more running two days a week and random third days. I will run 4 days every week from now on (barring vomiting, gushing blood, headaches that want to make me gouge my eyeballs out or death). I completed my first four day week last week with much success. Monday was a short two miles, Tuesday 4 miles (dreadmill), Thursday almost 5 miles (road), Friday 4 miles (road). In addition I biked about 32 miles with my long bike being Sunday of a 9.50 and a 6 mile rides. I also did one spinning class, two power hour classes and some lifting. So far this week I logged in 2.75 on Monday, Today was suppose to be a straight 4 miles but I just couldn't get going so I switched over to 1/4 mile intervals. Running 10.35 minutes per mile on my running and then reducing to a very fast walk on the alternationg .25 mile for a total of 4 miles then I did a steady 12 minute mile cooldown MILE for a total of 5. Very little knee and foot discomfort so it is getting better. I have been riding my bike back and forth to the Y because I have a theory. My theory: If I ride then run and it hurts real bad, then on days when I just run it should only hurt a little. I have yet to test that theory. In about another month or so of the biking/running combo I will give it try and drive to the Y to do the Thursday climate run...perhaps I will be able to stop and do some shopping at the VP while I wait for the others.....
Question: Am I the only one that suffers and thinks they are dying while running?

Trivia: It has been proven by science that I actually am hotter and more tired then the other woman I run with (okay I am talking temperture) According to Runner's World the larger you are the more surface area you have to cool and of course the larger the area the harder your body has to work to cool itself thus spending my precious energy supply not on speed but on cooling. So see I am really suffering far more then they are....it is not just whining...it is science.

Strange and Unusual Sighting: A very slender man, whose wife is constantly perplexed that he eats like a pig and NEVER gains a pound, was seen at the Y WEIGHING IN! I advised that his spouse would be most unhappy if she saw him weighing in and he covered by saying "I am trying to go up!" Ha I say I bet he has a secret stash of carrots and cauliflower at the office and that is how he stays thin.

Grandchildren:
Eldest Grandchild: Went to Ty's football game and though they lost he played mighty hard and had some good plays. He was covered from head to foot in mud. He then came back to my house where we played a game of scrabble (his choice). I am so happy I have a grandchild that loves scrabble! He then played Teken with his Grandpa and that ended our day. He is ready for this weekend's Scrabble tournament so lookout family!

Middle Grandchild: Miss Carissa is quite a beauty! She loves books and Doodle Bops (which are the most demented people/characters I have ever seen). She still likes to do "the monster" to make Grandma laugh and she now no longer is scared of the wagon.

Youngest Grandchild: Happy happy boy. Smiles and his face lights up. He loves to do "the muscle man" for Grandma (will post video of that later). Will not go to Grandma if Grandpa is around. Loves to ride in his little red wagon! Thinks Grandma is his napping cot. Thought he had chicken pox but just a false alarm. He had one of those baby "mystery rashes".

Oldest Niece: Getting closer to baby time...end of December. She is having a girl (good thing as before she even knew the sex she had purchased every pink baby item she could get her hands on, this was also fueled by the soon to be Grandma (who I might add was saying "I don't know why Amanda is buying all pink so soon" while Grandma herself was buying a pink bassinet). I am so glad she is having a girl as our men folk don't pull off pink so good.

Middle Niece: Smart, funny, and currently in a crap load of trouble with her Mom. Keep it up girlie and your college fund will be used for Bond Money....just kidding Amber....they probably won't let you post bond....just kidding....hahaha don't bad mouth me on you site cause you know I love ya...

Youngest Niece: Abby Abby where do I begin...ah my young niece has a fascination with Underdog, not the current underdog but the Underdog cartoon that her Mom and I use to watch as girls. She watches it ALL the time and every time she comes over here she requests to watch it even though I have a tons of other videos. So for those of you that are lacking in Underdog education I will educate you. Underdog is a mild mannnered dog until someone is in peril. When the need arises he takes his super energy pill (which somebody pointed out means Underdog uses drugs) and he becomes caped crusader UNDER DOG with super hero powers. Underdog has a girlfriend Sweet Polly Purebred who is constantly being, kidnapped, bound, gagged, blindfolded and either tied to railroad tracks or dropped from buildings by Underdog's arch enemy (whose name eludes me at this time). Underdog always saves Sweet Polly. Personally I think Underdog should tell Sweet Polly to get in the weight room and lift and then she would not get in these situations. I also note that Underdog will not share his "stash" so that Sweet Polly could have super hero powers too. However, our hero does love love Sweet Polly and he seems happy to fly to her rescue. So upon hearing Sweet Polly Purebreds shrieks of terror and cries of "Help Help, Save me Underdog" Underdog pops his pill and and rescues his damsal in distress. So our dear sweet Abby in her obsession over Underdog has begun binding, blindfolding and gagging her stuffed animals....my sister said she looked over on the dresser and there was poor little stuffed animal blindfolded with his feet bound and paws bound behind his back. Now I know if we were nice adults we would say "Abby it is not nice to bind and blindfold your stuffed animals" but I think it is funny as heck and have been laughing my butt off everytime I think about it. I think next time Abby is doing her villineous deeds that Denise should photograph it so I can blog it. Oh...I bought her the new release of Underdog on DVD for Christmas....

The Slug: Is slowing coming back to life as she begins her walking regime.

Husband: After 6 doctors, xrays, bone scans, nerve blocks and constant trips to the doctor to treat RSD we have found that he has TORN LIGAMENTS AND TENDON. He does not have the crippling disease that he was original diagnosed with! TORN LIGAMENTS AND TENDONS! It will definetely be a long healing process and he absolutely detests his air cast but he is wearing it.

My dumb brunett moment: I thought my car was broken...would not start....had my husband take me to work. He calls me at work and asked me who taught me to drive (actually it was him!) and said I did not have my clutch pushed in all the way when I tried to start it. In defense of myself I have to say that the floor mat had crunched up behind the clutch not allowing me to clutch all the way...it wasn't like I was all weak and delicate and unable to push the clutch in.


Pumpkin Push Conflict: The Pumpkin Push is the same day as the Feast so I will not be able to do the Push but perhaps I can find a 10k before or after that.

Scrabble Tournament: The first annual Kaufman/Groleau Scrabble Tournament. This weekend! Food Served. Prizes Awarded. I have been walking around stupid all week to save my brain power (see dumb brunette moment above). I also bestowed upon Tyson my Scrabble strategy so he may be a force to be reckoned with.

More Birthday Fun

Despite not wanting to hang out with the birthday boy because "He will slobber all over my toys", Abby is having fun!

Special Treats made for a special birthday boy! Grandma (me) made the brownie pops...tasty but alot of work!

BEING BLUE CAN SOMETIMES BE GOOD

Happy Birthday to Adam. One year old!

Are my shoes the only ones that do this?

The Merry Go Round Does Not Stop

I have been a most busy woman, at least it seems to be that way. It is more likely that I just do not use my time wisely so it appears that I am busy. So where did I leave off? Ah the Bun Run! Since then I have had my 27th wedding anniversay...yes kids I know you can do math! My beloved bought me a spiffy new coffee maker because he knows I love my coffee (plus he hated my old one). From me he received a gift of hours of pleasure...yes the 1st season DVD of Mash. Hours of fun! In addition, he received some man scent....I love Curve for men! Aside from that my last several Saturdays have been spent training for that elusive 11 minute mile. The first Saturday of August we did hills. Up the hill, down the hill, over and over and over. Not to mention we had our 1/2 mile warm up before the hills and our cool down was a mile. Jill and I discussed, rather I griped and Jill listened that the 1 mile could not be a "cool down" as it has a big giant hill at the end and then once over the hill and to the edge of the parking lot we sprint. But she is a good friend and listens to my gripe while still keeping me going. The hills in August were much more successfull then the hills I did in July as this time I actually finished both sets of 5 without stopping to walk. GO KIMMIE! However, by the end of the day I could barely walk and had to be pulled out of my Saturn. Last week we did Sprints (for the first time) and it was quite a workout. No sprints or hills this weekend because I am heading to Cincinnati/Newport for a girls weekend with my daughter and daughter in law.

Biking: Went biking with Jill and Barb last friday. Mapped it out and it was a bout 12 1/4 miles. They have real bikes. I have a Walmart bike. The result is me about a mile behind them pumping like crazy just trying to keep them in my sight. I feel like the little fat kid that is always yelling, "Hey guys wait up". After the last ride I decided I needed a helmet, front light and rear lights (0n account of some weird hillbilly in a beat up old pickup truck honked and made a rude gesture to me) So now I am visable and I was so proud of myself for buying a helmet and actually wearing it (because I look like a goober in it). That is until somebody I know asked me where did I get my helmet and I said Walmart and he rolled his eyes and said "Oh so you wanna die slowly" So I guess that means I need to go to the bike shop and get me a real helmet, which I am sure means "expensive helmet". While I am at it might as well get an expensive bike. So kids there goes you inheritance....no post death trip to Hawaii for any of you!

The heat and humidity have been high making workouts hard. On Thursday's climate run we had to stop and walk twice to cool down. But I have to say kudos to me because last year I would not have even set foot out the door in this weather. I spent all last summer in on the dreadmill. So progress has been made.



Grandma and Grandpa spending their money at Menards: We went shopping at Menards and came home with one baby swing and one red wagon great for pulling small children in!
He loves the red wagon and had lots of fun being pulled thru the park!

Upcoming Girls Weekend:

The plan is to leave early Saturday and head out to the Newport/Cincinnati area. So far we have planned to go to the aquarium. I sure my daughter and daughter in law are doing the aquarium to humor me but....but Kendra did perk up when I told her they had penguins. To balance out the aquarium we are going to a comedy club for dinner and a show. Hopefully we will find some good outlet malls because Christmas is right around the corner! Girls Just Wanna Have Fun!!!!!!!

Jerry's Leg: The doctor has now said he does not think Jerry has RSD (which is a very good thing as RSD is a very bad thing). However, he said he has no idea what is wrong with his leg. So my poor husband has been pushed off onto another doctor. This makes 6 doctors now and no diagnosis. He goes for an MRI (which I have questioned before why they have not done one) I had to push for a bone scan. MRI is set for tomorrow and then he goes to the doctor to have it read on Wed. Keep him in your thoughts! If it proves to be my diagnois I will be hanging my shingle on the door and accepting new patients shortly!

Okay I am tired and am heading off to bed. I did my first bricklet this morning 1.7 mile bike and 1.2 mile run and then 1.7 mile bike. Tomorrow is a baby brick 1.67 bike, 3 mile run 1.67 bike. Okay that last bike will be after lifting weights so I don't know if that technically counts. I guess since Saturday I will be traveling I better get a run in on Friday then I can take Saturday off and then just swim and do the eliptical at the hotel Sunday morning (cause I know my roomies at the hotel aren't gonna be getting up at 5:30 to work out with me. So over and out for now my friends!

Question of the Week Uttered by Yours Truely: "Jill, you're doing this to beat Amy.... why the heck am I doing this? Asked during our discussion about sprints and determining why we were putting ourselves thru such pain and agony. There was no answer.

Quote of the Week by Jill: "You need to work on consistency" Nice way of saying "Quit being a slacker Kim"

You gotta love a friend that will tell you like it is but in a nice way!

I WILL RUN FOR FOOD

Bun Run 5k: 84 Kim Kaufman 35:04 11:19
Far better then my zoo run run which had an average pace of 12:25
This all goes to prove my theory that when food is involved I work harder....as shown in the example above...see the bun run was at the HOT DOG festival. A festival which glorifies the all american goodness of the absolutely no redeeming food quality of the HOTDOG. Another example: I beat my son at bowling. Why because we were bowling for steak! I, who bowls maybe once a year, beat (by alot) my son who has bowled on leagues. I bet if we had a Cookie Run I would come in first because I am passionate about cookies. I am only ehhhhh about hotdogs but cookies...I bet I could run a 2 minute miles for cookies.

Thank goodness for my young friend because she kept me going when I thought I was going to stop. Matter of fact my heart rate got up to 191 and I slowed down and walked for one minute and then got it back down to the 160s and started again. Total walk times in this run...less then 4 minutes total. Which if I had not taken those and just slowed down I probably could have gotten in in 33 minutes. Something about the race scene just freaks me out because I do 5ks all the time without walking but for some reason when I get in a group setting I get freaked out, which is why I am trying to do all the 5ks I can find to get use to it. However, I do note that my heart rate accelarates alot so I am actually in the anaerobic stage of exercise which is not all that great and effective for training. So seeing as I am making such crappy process I am going to try and do some heart rate training. It has been said that this is much more effective training so we will give it awhirl. My max heart rate should be 175 and 85@ would be 140. So I am going to be working on that theory for awhile...except for 5k races which will be just about better my time..but for now training will be set at the heart rate goal. The article also said when you are in anaerobic state you are not burning fat supplies but rather "Your aerobic range runs from 70-85%, 85% representing your anaerobic threshold, or the point at which your body can no longer provide enough oxygen to the muscles to satiate the demands, so your body engages what is called your Adenosine Triphosphate/Phosphagen System (ATP/Phosphagen system), also known as your Anaerobic pathway. The body is now burning sucrose-based ATP in your muscles because its monosaccharide (one bonded carbohydrate per molecule) is a very simple form of energy, and burns very quickly." So now I am going to apply science and caloric control to my weight loss endevor. Back to measuring food and now I will be measuring my heart rate...sigh...
Well better get going I had vowed to do some work before church this morning and so far the ONLY things I have done are take a bath, blog and throw some toilet bowl cleaner in the toilet. I figure it is cleaning itself while I am blogging....

Will post pictures soon.

Drop and Give Me 20

Well the Y is closed this week due to maintenance. I am having Y withdrawl...so bad in fact that my friend Jill and I met in the Y parking lot Monday morning to do a workout, which consisted of a 5k run (actually a little further as Jill and I sorta missed a turn and had to back track), about every 3-4 blocks we would stop and do pyramid push ups. Which means the first time we did 5 then next stop 10 and so on up to 25, then we worked our way back down to 5 and then back up to 25. It was a good workout because even though she is much faster she can go run ahead and then run back to get me when it is time to do pushups. This particular workout has been named, "Mike's Tour of Duty". ****Mike had us do this workout one day when he was subbing. I think it must have looked quite funny to see a big brawny man running with a group of pudgy 40 year old women waddling behind him****At any rate it was a good workout and my heart rate stayed in the 170s pretty much consistently. Jill did great as always and I as always pathetically and slowly trotted far far behind her.

Updates:
Zoo Run Run: Horrible, for some reason EVERY time I do a run I bail. I don't know if it because I am by myself or what...but I start running and the next thing you know I am walking. I need to learn to quit freaking out! My zoo run run turned into a Zoo Run Walk run walk run walk. The Bun run is this weekend and I will be having a person pace me to keep me from walking. I finally found a runner just my speed...granted she is in highschool but hey I need a pacer and she is a pretty terrific kid (as is her sister!). I guess that is because they have really nice parents.

Pedicure: After the Zoo Run Walk Run Walk I got my very first pedicure compliments of my son and daughter in law. It felt really good and my piggies look glorious with their white tips...wellllllll maybe glorious is not the most apt description...perhaps less doglike....well they just look better then they did. I think the poor lady was in shock when she found she was going to have use a black and decker sander on my callouses.

Birthday: My daughter/her mother in law/her sister in law had a cookout/get together/birthday party and it was really nice. I got a heart rate monitor/calorie monitor which I had been eyeballing for awhile. I really want the nice little garmin but until I can hold an 11 minute mile I am not worthy and just am worthy of the heart rate monitor. I do love my new toy. While experimenting with it I found that office workers according to their caloric burning should not be consuming more then one greenbean and one grape.

Michigan: Went to Michigan this weekend for my inlaws 40th wedding anniversary celebration. I ate my weight in pastries every morning for breakfast, then would promptly go back to the room and sleep off my pastry induced coma. I would then spend the entire day complaining to my husband that I am the fattest person in his family. Next time I am staying at a hotel where NO PASTRIES are served. I have no self control. I am a big glutton. Even when I am full I just keep stuffing the danishes down my throat because "I won't get to eat this stuff again until my next trip" So I guess I am operating under the Bear/Hiberation/Food concept. Aside from my pastry overdoses I had a really nice time. However, I am now back at the jiggle when I run stage again.

House: I hope I don't die anytime soon because this house is a mess and I don't want people to say, "I can't believe she lived like this"

Things people will ask/say upon my untimely death:

Why does she have rubber chicken in a shoe box

Why does she have 10 pair of running shoes but only one pair of high heels

Ooooohhh yuck her sports bras are gray, I ain't touching those.

How come she has over 100 cookbooks but only cooks chicken, hamburgers and cubed pork on the grill.

Is it really neccessary to have canceled checks all the way back to the 1980's.

How many cans of green beans does one person need

Wow....Poison, Guns and Roses, Shakira, Gwen Steffani, Lorretta Lynn, Conway Twitty, Woodland Indiana Flute Music, and Scottish Bagpipes...was she a multiple personality?

Who's gonna cook Thanksgiving dinner?

Do you think she wants to be buried in her gym shorts, Y volunteer tee shirt, and running shoes (the answer is yes!)

I told her not to attempt that second mini marathon.

Upcoming Events

Bun Run this Saturday morning.
Tasha's birthday on Friday
Grandma Casey's birthday on Friday
Hair Coloring on Thursday...I know this is not an event of great family importance but I gotta look good for the bun run.

Grandmas and Kid Do Run Run the Zoo Run Run

Zoo Run Run is tomorrow and my 9 year old grandson will be participating as is the other Grandma and his father. What fun! I don't know how well I will do as my foot and knee have been difficult but I am going to muster through! I would at least like to do 33 minutes but if not that is okay. The weather should be nice, however, I just don't like 8:30 runs. What is wrong with the people in this town that they can't do a nice 6:30 or 7:00 am run? Actually I like 5:30 am. runs but I know NOBODY in this town would go for that.

Weight: Down 2 1/2 pounds this week but that may have changed as we ate dinner out last night for my birthday and my friend at work treated me to a Greek Chicken Wrap for lunch. Which I must say was one of the yummiest things I have ever had. No birthday cake untill after the Zoo Run Run though. May not even have it then as I am not a big cake fan.

Workouts: 1/2 mile on Monday, spinning and power hour, 3 miles on Tues(average pace 11.35 per mile), lifting and 3 mile bike ride in evening, Wed swimming, Thurs 4 1/2 miles (not sure of pace but I can absolutely say it was slow), lifting, today I am teaching power and because most of us are doing the Zoo Run Run we will keep it simple and easy...we are playing DODGE BALL! Yeah I love dodge ball!

Last Weekend! Hung out with two of my most favorite buddies: Tyson and I went to see fantastic four and then Adam came over about 6:30 pm and spent the night with Grandma so Mom could go to a BBQ. At 4:00 on Saturday I met my friend at the Y and put up our before and after bullentin board. She decorated and I got to use the stapler (0ne account of I have zero creativity). It looks fantastic and it has gotten lots of attention.

Tyson our overnight will be coming up soon...maybe we can go camping out at Grandpa's camp site and have a fire and do some fishing! Maybe the last weekend of July. We have a table set up so we can even play some cards!

Better get ready for the Y....I will update you after my run with the animals or should I say my trot with the animals.

HELP WANTED

HELP WANTED: Looking for someone to walk one slug like Grandma. No benefits, no pay, lousy hours. She is vicious and will bite if she smells fast food on you. However, if you enjoy hearing whining, moaning and crying...this is just the job for you! No experience necessary. Uniform provided.

The Broken: The slug a/k/a Grandma a/k/a my mom has broken her patella and severely strained her arm and shoulder by falling up the stairs (don't forget she just had to go to the hospital for her sciatic nerve). So now the exercise nazi a/k/a yours truely has deemed her a mobility/stability risk and has made her give a true promise that she will start walking and working on her healthy back exercises. Now we all know that the slug has the very best of intentions, however, her intentions don't always make it to the completion stage so I will be looking for some volunteers to "Slugercise" with her. Which means nothing hard...just 10 to 15 minutes of walking and about 10-15 minutes of stretching. We won't be able to start for awhile as her knee needs to heal but I think she really needs some support to make this a go. Just once a week would be great...so hopefully will get her to do at least 5 days a week! I would even be willing to make a tee shirt for the workers that says " I Love to Slugercise"

The Bloated: There is nothing more icky feeling then trying to run with about 3 pounds of water weight. I felt like a big old fat tick. Does anyone know when Menopause is suppose to start? Will I still crave cookies after Menopause? Will I start to look more like Jessica Simpson? Will I run like the wind because I do not have bloating?

Babys Got Tooth: Adam has his two bottom front teeth! He also had his first "Pepe's" experience and he loves rice but not as much as he loves "El Popo"

Ouch: Jerry got his nerve block today and advised that it is the WORSE pain he has ever felt in his life. Multilple shots in the back to deaden the nerve. He said NEVER AGAIN! However, his foot does feel better now. Next step physical therapy!

BIG LOSER JR: James is looking FANTASTIC as his weight loss journey begins. From the looks of him I would say down at least 25 p0unds.

KUDOS: Big Thank Yous to Kendra and Tasha this week for shuttling our injured to and fro this week.

I thought I would Die but did not: Last Saturday Jill, Bob and I went to the West side and did some hill training. While they did much running.... mine was like a little run, a little walk....a little run...a little walk...the circuit was 10 times around. Let me tell you 10 is not alot when counting cookies or m&ms. It is a lot when counting times up a hill. HOWEVER, before we started we had to warm up. The warmup was suppose to be a mile. That is until they saw the look of horror on my face. I about had heart failure when I heard a mile warmup then hills. They quickly revised it to 1/2 mile warm up (thank goodness for Jill who said "We can't make her so tired that she can't finish the hills"). I still attempted to wiggle out of 1/2 mile warmup by telling them I would "just run around the parking lot" while they did their warmup. That was not met with approval and so I was unsuccessful with my trying to avoid the 1/2 mile warmup. They said they would go slow and true to their word they trotted faithfully by my side. What goods friends to trot when they can gallop. We completed our hills and we sorta jogged back to the car where we stretched a little. They then advised "Okay time for our cool down" WHAT! I thought STOPPING was COOLING DOWN but oh no a cool down in the runners world is ANOTHER ENTIRE MILE AFTER DOING ENDLESS HILLS. After a little prodding, okay alot of prodding, I did the mile and what did we find during the mile cool down but yet another hill. Bob did say we were suppose to take the bigger hill but I am pretty sure he thought I would throw myself down on the ground and cry if he took the bigger hill so he turned up the smaller one. The fat little runner said "Thank Goodness!" I am glad I went even though I despise hills and I thank Jill for making it sound like "fun" and Bob for coming along to make sure we did not get lost or injure our selves in the attempt to do "hill workouts" So I made it through and am looking foward to trying conquer the "Mountains of Pain and Agony"

Random Thought: If this is not making me look like Jessica Simpson why the heck am I doing this? My thought while hill training.

Quote of the Day

"Did you take some kinda pill"

Spoken by my husband for my extreme housecleaning mode. Back up at 6:30 a.m. to organize my videos and DVDs by catorgories, dusted my living room (now Jerry will just have to guess my thoughts since I have no place to write), scubbed bathroom sink, tub and toilet (uck), cleaned my side of the room (big stack of books, magazines, 4 pair of running shoes, 1 pair of hiking books, one pair of slippers, two pair of jeans and threw all the stuff off the top of my nightstand into the nightstand drawer..a favorite cleaning trick of mine), wiped out the fridge and threw away things I thought might give me food poisoning, emptied the box of stuff I had from when I switched jobs, vacuumed the computer room and "straightened" it up, did dishes, and cleaned out the dogs ears (yet another argument against having future pets), attempted to get Lizzie (who is very ill) to take her medicine, repeatedly poked it in her mouth when she kept spitting it out...and NOW I am blogging and having a much deserved cup of joe. As soon as my laundry is dry we will be heading out to Walmart....

Update: I obtained a Walmart headache while in Walmart. I hate the new Walmart. I love the old Walmart. From now on I will drive to the old Walmart even though it is farther away. The people were driving me nuts. They were IN MY WAY AND THEY WOULD NOT MOVE. I need to rent out Walmart so I can shop by myself.

Baby Adam. He has a tooth. I can feel it. He will not let me see it. Even when I offered to trade him a yummy yummy enfamil bottle for one little peek of this tooth he would not open his mouth wide enough for Grandma to see. I told him no cookies till I see proof of tooth!

Bacteria Cocktails All Around!

Tuesday I started coming down with the flu by Wednesday I was in bed...not eating....cramping, achy, felt like one of the Sopranos worked me over. Little did I know that my sweet sweet granddaughter had whipped up a bacteria cocktail for Grandma.... which was passed to an unknowing loving Grandma via kisses...so Carissa's kisses packed a wallop. The Bacteria Family Tree is as follows: Sunday before last Adam projectile vomits at Indiana Beach...he was there with his parents and his Aunt Natalie, Cousin Tyson and Cousin Carissa....by Tuesday Baby Adam's parents are sick.....then the following Sunday (father's day WELCOME TO THE PUKING SIDE OF FATHERHOOD BRAD) Carissa begins the vomit festival, Monday Tyson joins in, by Tuesday her father, and I am sick and then Wednsday poor Natalie who is still recovering from open heart surgery is sick. What is ironic is that I am the only who wasn't vomiting all over the place. See there is something to be said for leading a healthy exercising life. The bacteria tried to take me down but only took down my front forces...my back troops stood firm. It took me two days and then I was pretty much over it beside a residual nausea. Despite being sick Tuesday and Wednesday, Thursday I was able to get a good lift in and I did 4 miles at 12 minute mile pace. Not bad for a girl that was bed ridden and unable to eat or drink for two days. I did bail on the Thursday climate run because I did not think I was up to 5 miles and I did not want to actually puke on Puke Mountain.

NEWS: Baby Adam is having a tooth break through...will keep you updated on this great breaking news!

KUDOS: My son James is on his way to being a big loser! 18 pound weightloss so far! Go Jamie Go! I will see you at the Mini next year!

Misery and Pain: My poor husband's foot is still not healed. If it is what they think it is he is in for alot of work to get this healed up if they can heal it at all. They suspect it is a nerve disorder...his nurses opinion"You will wish you just had a stress fracture"...ouch more to come on this topic after his Monday appointment with the rheumotoid doctor...which he will then likely be sent to a Nuerologist. They have tossed around RSD which if you go out on the web you will see that it is going to be no picnic for Jerry, if this is in fact what he suffers from.

Sewage: Every blog should discuss sewage at one time. My pipes have once again backed up and I cannot blame the King of Dookie since he is no longer living in the house a/k/a Jamie. So I guess it must be tree roots and other nasty nasty things. shudder.......So my husband once again (this has become twice a year pleasure), rented an electric eel and began the disgusting job of unclogging the drain pipe out to the road. Running an electric eel is not easy and takes quite a bit of strength and a very strong stomach. My husband has now vowed to take a chain saw to our neighbors tree and cut it down to keep it from working its wily roots into our drain.

Lady of the Night: I am a lady of the night. That is a carpet cleaning lady of the night. Seeing as I have no life my friday night was spent by shampooing my living room carpet. Of course I was looking fine as I was wearing my best attire for this roaring fun....my old running shoes, mens gym shorts and a tee shirt. I am surprised my husband could keep his hands off me as I was so drop dead gorgeous...dab a little lemon pledge behind my ears and who knows where the night might lead...... okay the running shoes, gym shorts, tee shirt and not even the lemon pledge caused my husband to whisk me away...so on with carpet cleaning.....It is 11:41 pm. I just finished the carpet and am contemplating whether I can dare have any more fun...perhaps I could dust my banister or the furniture. However, if I dust my furniture I effectively shut down my form of communcation with my husband as he can leave correspondence to me on the coffee tables and endtables. What an awesome way to save the trees! I really think house work is overrated but when I do it it is either very late at night or very early in the a.m. (night practically). Every once in awhile I will do a night time cleaning jag but overall I intensely dislike the whole house cleaning experience. Yes I like a clean house, yes I like order...yes I want someone else to do it for me...and thank goodness I married a man who likes to clean and is good at it (a gene passed down to my oldest son Brad..who vacuums his curtains and was excited to get a swiffer wet jet for his birthday)

My reason for disliking housework are:
1) If I dust I am disturbing the delicate balance of our ecosystem. Did they not teach us in school that we should leave nature as we found it?
2) House work causes injuries...the last time I was mopping. I got all into the mopping groove and drove the mop handle into my own face.
3) Everyone knows that a clean house is a sign of a boring woman
4) Running burns more calories then running the sweeper
5) I almost killed myself with a chemical mixture of comet and bleach. I thought this would be an awesome toilet cleaning solution...what it did was make a giant mushroom cloud of toxic fumes which caused my lungs to burn and my eyes to water and all I could smell was bleach for two days afterwards. I also think it gave my face a chemical peel.
6)Of course there is always the old standby..why clean it when it will just get dirty again.
7) I will have time to clean when I am retired
8)If you clean more then two days in a row people expect it all the time.
9)I don't think people feel comfortable in a house that looks like it should be in Better Homes and Gardens. At my house people don't hesitate to plop their feet up on my coffee table..even my 18 months granddaugher does this (and it is adorable).
10) Nobody ever had a headstone that said "She kept a really clean house"

Other News or Thoughts that are of no interest to anyone but me:

There is a run in Hell Michigan. I think it is like 5 miles. You get a shirt that says "I've run thru Hell" I want that shirt!

Since I have been slacking on the workouts my belly jiggles when I run. I don't like it. I have now kicked into high gear so I can be jiggle free for the Zoo Run Run.

My thighs are gigantic and I suspect it might not be all muscle.

Just because I think I look like Jessica Simpson does not mean other people do. ( I still think they are wrong though!)

I think it is okay to stop and have a cookie afterwork on Friday nights because it is better then stopping for a beer.

The scales were down 1 1/4 pounds on Wed.

Poison makes me run faster (not like arsenic but the group).

Well that is all for tonight. I think the lady of the night shall retire to her quarters.
Pictures to follow soon...one especially will bust a gut for those of us who can laugh at ourselves.

Just call me Monk

Well maybe I am not Monk on cleanliness because I could careless if my house is dirty and I embrace dust and disorganization. HOWEVER, I am a Monk when it comes to my schedule. I like to do the same things at the same time every day! But the month of May has been most hectic. Not that I mind because my family is my number one priorty and always will be BUT if I am not in my routine I have no discipline at all with food or exercise or anything else. So I am going to consider this week a write off and will start afresh this new week. My goals:

Resume being at the Y at 5:15 a.m. as opposed to dragging my sorry butt in every day *except Thursdays* at 6:00 a.m.
Quit Slacking in the weight room and yacking my jaws to my friends instead of pumping iron
Resume spinning and power hour with a vengence
The running will be 3 days with the long run being 5 miles. Probably do 3, 5 and 3 while my foot heals.
Lean to swim like a dolphin...okay maybe a penguin.
Not sitting on the couch in the evening but trying to do a least 30 minutes of house/yard work a night THEN going on my bike ride....oh resume nightly bike rides.
Resume afternoon walks at work

Biggest Loser: We are doing a bigger loser contest at work. The weigh in was Wednesday (honor system on account of no one wants to give up their numbers). The weigh in are every Wed and we have to chart our own progress. Again this is the honor system. Every week we put a $ in the kitty and at the end of 16 weeks the winner gets the pot. I have not yet heard if this is based on body percentage or just straight pounds. In order to be fair it should be body percentage. Perhaps this will give me an incentive to control my weekend food and get the rest of this chub off me. Because I really feel like the key to running is to get off 25 pounds...then I know I will be sleek and fast....like a race horse...well more likely a draft horse...but hey they are pretty fast when they get moving.

Hog Jog: This Saturday. My foot and knee hurt AND it is going to be hot as blazes. I have not yet determined if I will actually run it. I might bale on the 10k and do the 2mile. If you remember from last year the Hog Jog was a fiasco. It was hot. I was ill prepared. I was scared I would be last. I was miserable and I used vulgar language when I passed my son who was holding the video camera. He then attempted to blackmail me with the video with threats of showing my Grandma. That did not work. I told him he could show it to Grandma, he could show it to my mom, he could show it to the entire church and I DID NOT CARE b/c I WAS MISERABLE. This year....it will be hot...I am ill prepared (due to limited running b/c of knee and foot pain), my vulger language vocabulary has grown, and I know I will be last because I bet that guy that was last last year will not come anywhere near the hog jog. So there you have it...a receipe for disaster.

Self Loathing: I am in a high swing of self loathing. I look at myself and the first thing I think is DISGUSTING. Yes I have lost a lot of weight but I still have futher to go. Being overweight for years has done a lot of damage to my body and no amount of weight loss will fix that. I look like a candle that has had a lighter run around its outside. I guess that is the best way to picture my abdominal damage...I look melted. As for my thighs they are huge...I have giant quad muscles and it is not attractive..will dropping weigh reduce my quad size...and let me not begin with my donkey calves. My arms...yuck...again I don't think weight loss is gonna do a whole lot about that....I envy woman that can wear tank tops and sleeve less dresses...sigh......okay enough of the pity party...I guess Kim at this size is better then the size 28 Kim. But even if I could by chance become a size 10 Kim I would never look like a "normal" woman because I have to much damage..to my skin. Okay enough about that.

Upcoming events: Father's day and July 4th and then July 20 and July 21 Grandpa and Grandma Kaufman will be having their 40th wedding anniversary party/reunion

The BIG QUESTION: Will I suck it up and do the hog jog and realize that there is no shame in lastness?
Forecast: Will likely do it...will likely be last...will spend the next two months whining and complaining about the trauma of being last....

My weird thought: There is shame in lastness but that only pertains to me...when other people are last I am so proud of them for hanging in there...does this even make sense?

Not at the Y this morning as resting for my potential hog jog...so now I will jump in the tub and commence the beautifying so that I may stun my co-workers with my incredible beauty. (It is 6:15 now...I have to be at work by 8:00...the beautifying process is quite lengthy)

Pictures

Two peas in a pod.

Abby getting instruction from cousin Jamie on the proper use of foam blow dart guns. At least he bought her a foam blow dart gun. Aunt D bought Brad and James a real blow dart guns when they were like 14 and 15. I told her they would shoot each other. She says, "They are not stupid they won't do that" All night I heard from upstairs"Dude....Ouch!"

The sisters and the mothers. Grandma Mae, Me, Aunt Snoozy, Gma C, and Aunt D.

Amanda (and baby), Aunt D, Grandma Mae, Amber and Abby.

Tasha, James and Grandma Mae.

Natalie, Tyson, Brad, Carissa, and Grandma Mae.

Poor Kendra, Lucas and Adam have no family picture as Adam was at home throwing up!

Flu Bug Enters Town

Yikes...I stopped over to see my little buster brown (a/k/a Baby Adam) on Sunday and two hours later he was puking at Indiana Beach. I am assuming it was not Grandma kisses that made him sick but the flu bug. Yes indeed it was the flu bug because yesterday at work I get a phone call...a weak little voice says, "Mom, what are you doing". I respond that I am at work and then the most pathetic little voice says..."Oh I am puking and Lucas is pukings" She sounded so sick and weak! The calvary rode in a/k/a Grandpa (he had a light schedule) and he picked up the little guy so Mom and Dad could puke in peace. This was Grandpa's first day by himself with Adam! I came home on my lunch break and they were doing just fine. Matter of fact he said I was disturbing them as I made Adam cry and whine when he saw me because he wanted Grandma to hold him. Grandpa changed diapers, Grandpa gave the baby a nap, grandpa made a baby fort to keep baby corraled. The corral was an elaborate set up of coffee table, couch, toy box, baby saucer and a gate made of his baby rings. Adam and Grandpa made their first fort! Grandpa and Adam also went to Walmart where they bought a new disc for the camera and a spiffy new teething ring that vibrates when it gets chewed on. Grandpa says Adam is a chick magnet. When I got home from work Adam and Grandpa were sitting on the porch swing just happy as clams. I called to check on Kendra she still had a fever and the chills so I told her I would keep Adam overnight and then Grandpa would bring him home in the morning on his way to work. She was most appreciative! I get the play pen set up in our room and put in his favorite blanket in preparation for bed time. So now...will Adam sleep all night so that Grandma may have her wits about her when she goes to work..or will Adam stay up all night, demand that he be in Grandma's and Grandpa's bed and then kick and roll all over Grandma and Grandpa all night? I an happy to report...Adam slept...in the play pen...only woke up once...I promptly stuck his plug in (pacifier) and he went back to sleep...He did not want to go to sleep at first because we had the light on and the TV on. He crawled all over us, all over the bed..we put him in the play pen....he was not happy...put him next to me on the bed...he thought we were playground eqipment. Grandpa final turns off the TV and the light and goes downstairs to watch "Glen Beck". He tells Adam "Goodnight it is your bedtime". Baby puts his head down and falls asleep and the transfer to the play pen was successful. Now lets just hope Grandma and Grandpa avoid the flu bug. I hope Adam did not send his flu bug to Florida via Grandma Mae.

Cute things are children have done:Abby and Tyson: Played military...we were short on GI Joes so the military consist of a few GI Joes, mini babies, little care bears, little fisher price people, and Kelly dolls. Tyson says to Abby "Lets play war" and Abby says she does not know how. Tyson then proceeds to fill her in on military strategy and such. He was very serious about the ways of war! Abby says to me "Aunt Kim babies are in the military" hmmm out of the mouth of babes. At any rate Abby's army of babies and one GI Joe was totally destroyed by the army of two GI Joes, care bears, fisher price people and the kelly dolls. Evidently Fisher Price people are much more fierce then they appear. Upon the destruction of Abby's Army she threw her self back in the chair and sobbed.

Carissa: Drama Queen to the Extreme...she works the crowd...she is destined for Hollywood. She does this thing called, "The Monster" Picture above..."The Monster" looks funnier when she is not covered in mac and cheese. She does "The Monster" on command and just when ever it strikes her and has found it a fine way to get laughs. The adults are all sitting in a circle and Carissa does her monster (which makes Grandma laugh like crazy) and while she is doing it she is swiveling around so the whole family can see it. Aunt Suzie says she needs to stop because people are going to think something is wrong with her. Grandma loves it! I love that she goes up to random people and does "The monster".

Mae: Mae made it safely back home! She said she had a great time! We did as well! My dad would have found it quite funny that we took his diamond bedecked wife to a tavern/pub for lunch and yard saling.

Time to get ready for work...missing the Y since we have Adam but will be back in the swing of things by next week...providing my knee and foot improves...otherwise it will be alot of swimming.