Just call me Monk

Well maybe I am not Monk on cleanliness because I could careless if my house is dirty and I embrace dust and disorganization. HOWEVER, I am a Monk when it comes to my schedule. I like to do the same things at the same time every day! But the month of May has been most hectic. Not that I mind because my family is my number one priorty and always will be BUT if I am not in my routine I have no discipline at all with food or exercise or anything else. So I am going to consider this week a write off and will start afresh this new week. My goals:

Resume being at the Y at 5:15 a.m. as opposed to dragging my sorry butt in every day *except Thursdays* at 6:00 a.m.
Quit Slacking in the weight room and yacking my jaws to my friends instead of pumping iron
Resume spinning and power hour with a vengence
The running will be 3 days with the long run being 5 miles. Probably do 3, 5 and 3 while my foot heals.
Lean to swim like a dolphin...okay maybe a penguin.
Not sitting on the couch in the evening but trying to do a least 30 minutes of house/yard work a night THEN going on my bike ride....oh resume nightly bike rides.
Resume afternoon walks at work

Biggest Loser: We are doing a bigger loser contest at work. The weigh in was Wednesday (honor system on account of no one wants to give up their numbers). The weigh in are every Wed and we have to chart our own progress. Again this is the honor system. Every week we put a $ in the kitty and at the end of 16 weeks the winner gets the pot. I have not yet heard if this is based on body percentage or just straight pounds. In order to be fair it should be body percentage. Perhaps this will give me an incentive to control my weekend food and get the rest of this chub off me. Because I really feel like the key to running is to get off 25 pounds...then I know I will be sleek and fast....like a race horse...well more likely a draft horse...but hey they are pretty fast when they get moving.

Hog Jog: This Saturday. My foot and knee hurt AND it is going to be hot as blazes. I have not yet determined if I will actually run it. I might bale on the 10k and do the 2mile. If you remember from last year the Hog Jog was a fiasco. It was hot. I was ill prepared. I was scared I would be last. I was miserable and I used vulgar language when I passed my son who was holding the video camera. He then attempted to blackmail me with the video with threats of showing my Grandma. That did not work. I told him he could show it to Grandma, he could show it to my mom, he could show it to the entire church and I DID NOT CARE b/c I WAS MISERABLE. This year....it will be hot...I am ill prepared (due to limited running b/c of knee and foot pain), my vulger language vocabulary has grown, and I know I will be last because I bet that guy that was last last year will not come anywhere near the hog jog. So there you have it...a receipe for disaster.

Self Loathing: I am in a high swing of self loathing. I look at myself and the first thing I think is DISGUSTING. Yes I have lost a lot of weight but I still have futher to go. Being overweight for years has done a lot of damage to my body and no amount of weight loss will fix that. I look like a candle that has had a lighter run around its outside. I guess that is the best way to picture my abdominal damage...I look melted. As for my thighs they are huge...I have giant quad muscles and it is not attractive..will dropping weigh reduce my quad size...and let me not begin with my donkey calves. My arms...yuck...again I don't think weight loss is gonna do a whole lot about that....I envy woman that can wear tank tops and sleeve less dresses...sigh......okay enough of the pity party...I guess Kim at this size is better then the size 28 Kim. But even if I could by chance become a size 10 Kim I would never look like a "normal" woman because I have to much damage..to my skin. Okay enough about that.

Upcoming events: Father's day and July 4th and then July 20 and July 21 Grandpa and Grandma Kaufman will be having their 40th wedding anniversary party/reunion

The BIG QUESTION: Will I suck it up and do the hog jog and realize that there is no shame in lastness?
Forecast: Will likely do it...will likely be last...will spend the next two months whining and complaining about the trauma of being last....

My weird thought: There is shame in lastness but that only pertains to me...when other people are last I am so proud of them for hanging in there...does this even make sense?

Not at the Y this morning as resting for my potential hog jog...so now I will jump in the tub and commence the beautifying so that I may stun my co-workers with my incredible beauty. (It is 6:15 now...I have to be at work by 8:00...the beautifying process is quite lengthy)