Physician Heal Thyself

Is there a Doctor in the House?
As you know, the poor little piggy that went wee wee wee all the way home was terribly wounded during my pathetic attempt to complete the Indianapolis Mini (see picture previous post). Instead of improving it became more and more hideously swollen. It eventually looked like an unborn alien encased in it's embryonic sac. I could barely walk on it. I could not even wear my office shoes. Just a light touch would send waves of pain thru my foot. Now a normal rational woman would have called her physican to make an appointment to have it checked out or at the very least gone to the Urgent Care Center to have her toe inspected and to get a qualified medical opinion and perhaps an antibiotic but not me. For I am....the QUEEN OF THE GOOGLE MEDICAL SEARCH. For years now I have self diagnosed myself and managed to avoid the doctor (in part my avoidance of the doctor use to because I did not want to get weighed...really why do you need to get weighed to have your cough checked out?) But as I stared at my hideously deformed piggy I thought why should I pay a $20 co pay when I have google and a first aid kit? So after much inner debating, I looked at my husband and said, "I think my piggy needs surgery". I then proceed to hobble around to collect my surgical tools...sewing needle..could not find one...substituted a safety pin, tweezers, liquid bandage and scissors. Unfortunatly I did not have a pair of scissors in my first aid kit. However, my husband had a nice little pair on his desk. I hobble back to the bedroom and hop on the surgical table a/k/a my bed. My husband looks horrified, no he was not horrified because I was going to do self surgery but because his desk scissors were part of my surgical equipment. He says, "You're not using my desk scissors to do that are you? Use your own scissors." I inform him that my scissors are the kitchen shears. The ones I use to cook with. He then does not say another word about me using his desk scissors. (Though I do note that he has not returned them to his desk but they continue to lay on the nightstand..I think they are my scissors now.)I will not give you all the gory details but will summarize by saying "Jab,cut, squeeze, cut, Jab, squeeze, pry off nail, and a liberal spraying of liquid bandage and multiple shrieks of pain" The next morning I could put my shoe on and walk. Total Cost $0.00. Piggy looks just fine now..just a little naked without the nail.

The Crash of 2008:
You might have noticed I have been uncharacterically quiet for the last few weeks. That is because my BABY crashed. She gave me warning but I paid her no heed. She was slow. She would freeze up. She would do take her sweet time when I clicked. She tried to tell me...she warned me...and then it happened...I clicked...she refused to answer. I begged. I pleaded. I offered her a new virus checker. I offered her a fancy new keyboard. But to no avail. She was offended, likely because I have been having laptop lust. She did take pity on me enough to let me grab my picture folders and my music folder. Thanks to Kendra, Lucas and James and Tasha I have a nice external hard drive to back up to ( a Mother's day gift). So I took the big plunge..after trying all else...I...GASP OF HORROR....reformatted my hard drive and returned my computer to factory settings...ahhh the agony... so now we are up and running... I will never take her for granted again. I will tell her I love her every day and never look at a laptop again.

The Frankenstein Shuffle:
I have been recovering from my injury and have been reduced to do a Frankenstein shuffle. It is getting better and I am finally getting some bend in my knee but I still look quite odd and am VERY VERY slow. Sunday I took my first walk/run accompanied by my husband. My knee would slightly bend. I was getting calf pain, though I do believe that to be just tight muscles. I would sort of bounce walk/run. I could feel every day of non running. My body felt like it weighed a million pounds. My legs would not cooperate. My lungs were screaming that they hated me and threatened to shut down on me. My calf, since it could not be heard over the sound of my screaming lungs, sent shooting pains up to my skull as a gentle reminder that it had told me it DID NOT WANT TO RUN. Of course my mind tells them all to shut up and that it is in control and it forced the rebelling body parts to finish the two miles. All must have been forgiven for I had no pain the following day. So now I have returned to my regular scheduled workouts with a modified running schedule meant for leg rehab.
This weeks workout: Sunday: 2 miles walk/run, 3 mile bike and 1.79 walk to church. Monday: 3 mile bike ride to Y and back and power hour, Tuesday: 3 mile bike to Y and back, 2 1/2 mile walk/run (of which I had slightly more knee bend and less calf pain) and 6.79 evening bike ride. Wed: Swimming and 1.79 walk to church. I note that I have no lifting in there because I usually lift on my lunch break but work has been very hectic and so lunch time has gone bye bye for awhile.

NO RUNNING=REALLY MISSING MY CLIMATE RUN FRIENDS

Quotes: "I thought you said he was good?" yelled by Kendra over the shrieking sounds of Adam when we were yard saling.

"Were you in my doughnuts?" Spoken by Jerry in a VERY suspicious voice while counting his doughnuts.

UPDATES: G-Ma is moving into a new apartment because she is tired of the old drunk man upstairs calling her "Momma"
Adam found falling and getting a fat lip will score a freezer pop.
G-Ma's doctor, much to her disgust, told her the weather was getting good so she could get some walks in. Soon to be Mother Tasha now has a bump! Kendra is having oral surgery on Friday and Adam will be hanging with Grandma and Grandpa.